Operating time matters more than mileage. Back when I worked at Ford SciLab, they figured that average speed was 50. Prior to the late 70’s, engine parts were designed for 2K operating hours, to give a 100K part lifetime. Of course, if they’re all designed to go 100K, some are going to break early, so there was a big emphasis on changing that mentality. I’ve put over 150K miles on every (American) car I’ve owned since my 82 Escort (which died horribly at 100K). Most of my driving is commuter with 20-30 minute one-way trips, which isn’t hard mileage.
My wife had a two hour all-freeway round trip commute, and her Chrysler Sebring was over 190K when she traded it in, and it was still running very well. But I bet I had more operating time on my car.
The worst is indeed frequent short trips where the engine doesn’t get time to warm up. Sorry, I don’t have a cite, but this is pretty common knowledge. (Please feel free to fight my ignorance if anyone knows otherwise and can back it up.)
However, with modern (post 1970) oils, this isn’t nearly as bad as it used to be. SAE-30 oil doesn’t flow well until the engine is warm, so when running cold, you’re running with insufficient lubrication. Newer SAE 10W30 or better oils flow reasonably when the engine is cold, offsetting this issue dramatically. But still, parts wear differently at different temperatures, so you’re best off running the car most of the time at a constant (warmed up) temperature. And before your engine is warm, GO EASY! Avoid quick starts, and take it slow up any inclines.
Another issue is carbon buildup. I don’t know whether this even happens with modern control systems and emission controls – cars really are quite different today than they were in the 70’s. Anyway, with the older cars, running most of the time with low loads (not pushing the engine) could cause carbon deposits on the cylinder walls. These would continue to glow after killing the ignition, and you’d have a car that would keep running (kinda) after shutting it off. The quick fix was to run the engine hot for a good bit, like taking a freeway joy ride.
Yes, that did happen, and it did work. But that was back in the days of carbueretors, no emission controls, and big-block engines. These days, most cars are not overpowered, so even mild city driving should keep them loaded well enough (sorry, this is just MHO part you asked not to get). In any case, it’s been a LONG time since I’ve heard a car keep running after it was shut off. I’m not sure whether that’s because of no carbon buildup, or better fuel control (no carb bowl fulla fuel to draw, to keep the engine sputtering).
The Car Talk guys say that the best way to get a car to last long is to go easy on acceleration and breaking. They didn’t back that up with much explanation, but it sounds right to me, and it seems to work pretty well for me, too. I think we’ve had 8 cars that we got over 150K miles and were still running well (but starting to need more frequent repairs) when we replaced them. Usually, it’s the transmission that starts to go at that age. This included Ford and Chrysler cars. I have nothing against GM, I just got employee or family discounts on the other two makes.