Well ok, it just seems that many in this thread are answering that they would lie to a loved one on their death bed but under the caveat that they had also suffered some degree of mental deterioration. I think most people would probably agree with such circumstances, they don’t really present much of a moral dilemma at all. When a person on their death bed isn’t in full control of their mental faculties, you aren’t really interacting with your loved one.
Well ok, it just seems that many in this thread are answering that they would lie to a loved one on their death bed but under the caveat that they had also suffered some degree of mental deterioration. I think most people would probably agree with such circumstances, they don’t really present much of a moral dilemma at all. When a person on their death bed isn’t in full control of their mental faculties, you aren’t really interacting with your loved one.
I wouldn’t outright lie just because someone was dying I wanted them to be happy. For starters, we never really know how long someone will live. There are people who survive injuries or illness despite all odds, and others who die in routine treatment from that 1/10,000 risk of complications. If I’ve lied to them and they don’t die, then there’s some real harm done to the trust between me and my loved one. Trust is a valuable thing.
On the other hand, there are always options to sugar-coat things or simply omit it entirely. Using Israel-Palestine as an example, I could always say “There’s a new peace initiative being discussed,” and with cancer I could always say there’s some new cure.
Even with family issues. I have a relative starting divorce proceedings. If that would upset a dying relative, I could quite honestly 1) avoid it entirely 2) say “They’re having some relationship problems” without disclosing divorce or 3) say “I don’t really know what’s happening. You should talk to X.” All of them allow me to be basically honest without having to come right out and say the worst.
Someone brought up an example about the another person in an accident who died. In that case, I’d say “We’ll find out more from the doctors soon.” Again, it’s basically true in just about any situation.
Frankly, I have a hard time even lying to people who have dementia or similar problems. I know there’s no point in upsetting them when they won’t understand and won’t remember. So I go along, but it rubs me the wrong way.
The OP specified the context though, and it was that the dying person is lucid and the lie is about progress being made with some cause that this person cares about.
I don’t want to put words in Dallas Jones’s mouth, but since his “What if it were you?” post was directed at iiandyiiii he was presumably inviting iiandyiiii to imagine himself in the same situation that iiandyiiii had described in the OP.