Excalibre, to add to my post above, personal experience, but I think it a good example: I was taught at a young age the scientific/neutral words for sex organs and how that biological system works, with no awful NoNo baggage or shame. My parents were not hippie types, they were university science department stock. I was given the facts, words to use to describe sex, and lots of opportunity to observe the same action in Nature.
With that upbringing, I view penises and vaginas as biological apparatus, very wonderful amazing biological apparatus at that. Not cold and detached at all, though, goofy humor about them bits is more delightful without the veil of shame. Sex is a brilliant system for perpetuating all kinds of swell beings, but not without its poignant absurdities.
It took me a long while into my adult life to realize that the way I was taught was not the norm. I’ve just always wondered what the Big Deal with horrification over"naughty bits" was. I don’t get it, truly.
I was certainly taught the scientific terms as well - it’s sort of surprising to me to imagine anyone doing otherwise with their children. But there’s nothing “neutral” about any of those words for me either way. They all carry a great deal more connotational baggage than comparable words for other parts of the anatomy. I think the fact that you view those parts with “goofy humor” is pretty significant evidence that they’re not the same as other parts. At least I don’t recall ever hearing any “ear humor”. So I don’t know why people would expect “neutral” terms to exist, and again, it’s clear that none of the terms we have are even remotely “neutral”.
Please don’t confuse what you might hope for those terms to be - neutral and not carrying emotional connotation - for what they actually are. It’s quite apparent that they are not neutral in their connotation.
I come from a family of doctors so it only seemed natural that we would use scientific terms. My sister and her ex decided on that course with their kids as well. When my eldest niece was about two, though, she was a little confused. She thought that the appropriate word was not vulva, but volvo. My sister drove a volvo station wagon at the time, only making things worse. She’s ten now, and I think she’s got things straight.
-Lil