I think pranking kids is a good thing. Kids need to learn how to detect when someone’s bullshitting them–especially authority figures–and they also need to learn how to distinguish playful teasing from bullying. My father would always trick us. I’m sure the first couple of times I was fooled, I took it hard. But I wasn’t traumatized. It wasn’t the trickster part of my father’s personality that made being with him uncomfortable sometimes. It was his serious side.
That said, I think you have to start small. Telling a four-year-old that you ate his candy is different than saying that Cookie Monster did. Cookie Monster isn’t someone you’re supposed to trust (at least with food), while your parents are. Also, personally my parents would have yelled at us if we had cried over something they had done–so not only would I be sad (putting myself in the shoes of the four-year-old), I’d be afraid to show it. This is just not a fun experience in a kid that young.
However, out of all the “wrongness” a parent can do to a child, this is tiny potatoes. If the parent-child relationship is forever damaged by a single prank, it was destined to fail.
WRT to the videos YMMV, but it sounds like your mom needs to lighten up, either that or rename her Francis. And even though you question your son-in-law’s character, you need to remember that your daughter picked him to be the father of her children…so maybe you should lighten up too.
I’ve never looked well on people who dismiss children’s feelings simply because they’re children and don’t really know what big stressful adult problems are like. Ha-ha, they are making a big deal over their candy, but they are just stupid children so I can dismiss how upset they are as nothing. The “joke” is cruel. In my mind jokes should be fun for all parties involved. With the right kid at the right age this candy “joke” will destroy some trust. Kids learn their knocks easily enough through other elementary school kids, they don’t need their parents adding to the pile.
I mean great, you have the person who can control every aspect of your life down to what you wear, what you eat, and where you go, and now that person has decided to play games with your possessions? The one thing maybe you thought was all yours? Lovely.
I think it really depends on the personality of the kid. Some kids will think it’s funny and move on. Others will harbor this as a terrible memory through their life. I have one kid of each. One would think it’s pretty funny, the other would be very distraught for the whole day and likely bring it up months and years later as an example of how bad we are as parents.
However, these videos take it too far. It seems like bullying. If a classmate hid his candy and said he ate it and made the kid cry, those same parents would likely be talking to the school administrators about punishment for the classmate.
This wasn’t a joke. It was a prank. A prank is a joke at someone’s expense. Anytime I’ve pulled a prank, I made sure it was something that would never sour a relationship, like “Hey Larry, it’s the police, your wife’s been involved in car accident! … HAHAHAH!”
I don’t think the parent’s are dismissing their kids feelings here. They’re taking advantage of it. I think what upsets most people is the crying involved. And not that you should make your kids cry everyday, but believe me, they’re more than capable of doing that on their own. And they do.
Taking advantage of people though, I consider a negative act. And you can’t take advantage of someone on purpose without considering their feelings on the matter as less important than what you will gain. To me, that’s dismissive of their feelings. So your argument only reinforces my belief that this particular prank isn’t a net positive thing, and I still disapprove.
I think the ultimate lesson in this is that you CAN trust your parents, even when they seem to be acting in ways that don’t make sense. They aren’t really going to screw you over- have some faith!
This prank would have been small beans in my family. That’s how you build resilient kids. Obviously you shouldn’t do this to a sensitive soul, but if your kid would truly be hurt by this talk red to build some trust.
…now That’s funny! Or telling them that if they pour coke on a Late Night Host’s car enough times during the year, the evil candy prankster will go away.
“I made your candy disappear…!”
“Yeah? I turned your Maseratti into a Pinto…!”
Exactly! Besides, pranksters are always trying justify their damaged BS… and now they want to pass it on to their kids, like Domestic Violence.
I’m not the kind of person who finds pranks to be funny, ever, so the whole thing seems unnecessary and gauche to me. I’m all for joking around with my kid, and raising a resilient kid, but this seems like neither. Full disclosure: I saw one clip of this in a previous year, so haven’t seen a lot of them, or recently.
Making a child cry, for your amusement, reflects badly on you, in my books.
Bringing your own child to tears, to make a tape for a tv show, makes me shudder and wonder what kind of parent you must be. Do you torment your pets for fun? Will it be okay when the kids do?
I can’t help wondering is it okay to do this to someone else’s kid? Or just your own? Would you care if somebody else did this to your kid? What if you/they, instead of candy, told them their dog died?
I mean, it is literally taking candy from babies. Where’s the funny?
It’s a minor annoying prank to pull on your kids if they fall for it, but there is a lot worse parents can do. My mother regularly stole my candy for real and never showed any regret about it.
There are children who live for years in refugee camps. There are children who flee in the night in a hail of gunfire. There are children who survive earthquakes and hurricanes. There are children who watch their parents die. They turn out fine and become normal adults. Children are amazingly resilient to just about anything you can throw at them. It won’t hurt them to spend ten seconds of their lives thinking somebody at their KitKat bar.
You honestly don’t see the difference between performing what anybody would consider a normal-to-necessary daily routine, and lying to your child about something that’s very important to them? In order to get a few laughs on a fucking TV show?
For anybody who says “Oh it’s just candy.” It’s not about it being candy, it’s about emotional abuse based on a breach of trust. Is it funny to tell the kid “Hey, I put your dog to sleep today?” How about “I smashed the heads of all your collectible china dolls that your grandmother left to you!!”
Yeah, my kid has been crying because she has to go to the dentist, but she’s still going to the dentist. I’m trying different things to make it seem less scary, but they’re not working well.
With the hair brushing, I would be surprised if you were brushing her hair more/harder in order to get a bigger reaction so that you could film it and show other people or maybe have it be on TV. And I don’t imagine you set her up in a scenario (I know she’s younger, so in theory) where she believes her hair is fine and no brushing will happen, only to swoop in with HA HA I’M REALLY BRUSHING YOUR HAIR.
Okay, I don’t think the Halloween videos are the worst things ever in the history of the world, but kids cry a lot ANYWAY for random reasons known only to them. I don’t get why parents would add to that on purpose, for their own amusement.
When I was little my Dad actually used to eat as much of my Halloween candy as he could after I went to bed. I’d ask what had happened as the stuff I was saving obviously was gone. My Dad said he ate it. I got over it pretty quick.