I call it, for lack of a better term, Notting Hill Syndrome, though some may just call it ‘sick’ or ‘depression’ or ‘obsessive.’ In the movie, Hugh Grant’s character has a philosophy that allows him to not get worked up over his problems, b/c he looks at all the big stuff in the world- from his paralyzed friend to starving children in Africa- and points out that, well, it’s all small stuff, basically.
The tendency I’m describing is when a person desires that ‘bad’ things (ie tragic deaths by conflict, natural disaster, starvation, industrial disaster, murder, etc.) happen in his country or others, namely events he can hear on the news every day, so that his problems will seem small in comparison. Let’s say he isn’t worried about anything in particular; also, he is not obsessed with morbidity, and he does not take pleasure in the suffering of others.
In all honesty, I do not know for certain. (IANAP!) Maybe something to do with low self-esteem/self-worth (“My own problems are worthless in comparison to other people’s!”) or perhaps overmuch altruism?
Slight hijack, for which I apologize: the aforementioned viewpoint is one of those things that irritates me like nothing else. Yes, it’s not good to be too self-centered, but just because there are bigger problems to be worried about doesn’t mean that your own deserve no recognition whatsoever. Balance, people, balance! Reminds me a bit of when people are discussing, say, the legalization of pot or gay marriage, and someone inevitably brings up the scintillating point, “Don’t we have bigger things to worry about? There’s a war going on, you know!” That should be a maxim, like Godwin’s: “Big problems do not automatically serve to invalidate the small ones!”
Histrionics also tend to make a big deal of little things in their own lives, though, which makes me think it’s not such a great description of this behavior.
How is this a disorder? I’ve have rationalized this way, but I don’t have a desire for bad things to happen! It’s not like I’m sitting around hoping for another tsunami to validate my crappy work hours. But yes, my problems overall are nothing in comparison to the evils which infiltrate people everyday. And I’m greatful for that. I don’t see how taking this view is somehow a disorder, or indicates low self-esteem.
What La Llorona describes does not describe what I’m talking about. I know what that person’s talking about, but it’s not a sense of altruism here.
And to answer the most recent post, this is a psych. thing b/c this person desires, in a somewhat obsessive way (although not so strongly that it overwhelms this person), that deadly things happen in his/her or other countries about every day so that when he/she checks the news h/s can here about them and feel better about h/h problems, not as a sense of ‘ha- those people died,’ but like a perverse version of Hugh Grant in Notting Hill. But Grant’s character didn’t require a body count headline every day.
I do see a counselor, I take medication, I am not in danger of hurting anyone, and I am not looking for any psych. help on these boards; but you may have guessed I’m referring to myself. I’m asking the question out of curiousity, nothing more.
Ack. Missed the “desires” part completely. Apologies!
Hmmm, that’s interesting. I’ve never heard of that before. Would you say that this is more of an active desire (you wake up in the morning and literally think, “Gee, I hope X in whatever country happens today so that I can feel less bad about, say, my car payment being late”) or more of a passive one? And you say you don’t take joy in the suffering of others, but that it does give you some sort of satisfaction in comparing it to your own problems. Can you clarify?
(I’m sorry if that comes out badly…I’m truly not judging you or condemning you. I’m honestly just curious to learn more about that viewpoint.)
Also–IANAP, IANAP, IANAP! But it certainly couldn’t hurt anything to just give this a mention to your own…
No, I don’t have any certain desire in mind when I think of the type of things that could happen in the world. But the ones you hear about most often on the news are
[ul]
[li]natural disasters[/li][li]murders[/li][li]conflict deaths[/li][/ul]
And these aren’t even the things that kill the most people each day; not at all. These are only the ones you hear about the most. There are no headlines for the 24,000 starving daily, b/c that’s not a news story; it wasn’t an event.
Most people get tired of hearing bad news, but from my perspective, there isn’t that much. Natural disasters are very rare, murders are rare, and there are only 26 ongoing conflicts in the world, most of which don’t cause headline fatalities periodically.
For a few weeks, I didn’t go on Cnn.com, and I would plug my ears at the news if I heard it somewhere, just b/c I didn’t want to hear about any tragedies- and that works. The obsessive part is not at all overwhelming; it’s only a tendecy. I did check today, and the top headline is that hundreds are killed in Uzbekistan in a conflict. This is precisely the kind of thing I tend to; to me, this is the biggest calamity on the news is a short while.
And no, I never compare an event directly to one of my own problems- b/c I don’t specifically have problems that I’m comparing anything to. I have no major worries. It’s more like comparing what happens to the problems of what I see as the average American, myself.