Oh, he sounds clever enough to have escaped. 
I didn’t say anyone should hoot and holler. I said that a reason NOT to do so is to move the graduation along.
And I suggested that a CNA in one family may be the equivalent of a lawyer in another. I was confused you’d take a less compassionate position, but now I see that’s b/c of those people, from whom you took crapola, and who *ruined *things by not having a separate (but equal) ceremony, for their lesser efforts, foolishly believing that they were part of the same educational community.
Most of the graduations where I live are definitely time-limited, because they’re held at the local Enormodome and they’ll do 4 or 5 in a day, starting at about 9am. Same thing in my hometown; my class was over 500 and it didn’t last all day.
At my university, each program had its own graduation, and because there were 86 people in my program, we had ours in a hotel ballroom and each of us got 8 tickets. One of my friends was the first person in her family to graduate from college (most of her relatives were HS dropouts) so this was a really big deal, and several of us gave our extra tickets to her. That one didn’t last very long either, and another thing I definitely remember is that I would see someone and know EXACTLY who they were related to.
My roommate was in liberal arts and over 2,000 people walked at the basketball arena (AKA Enormodome) the following day, and I heard her name called while I was waiting in line at the bank drive-through.
I’m headed to preschool graduation tomorrow.
I feel for you. I played baritone sax in high school.
Seconded. I attended one for a friend when I was a junior; skipped my own as a result. Even a Pitt student can learn from experience. 
My university has multiple ceremonies, including one just for the English Department. When I graduated, there were so many graduates to walk the stage that I was able to step out with another classmate, have a beer, and return before they had finished.
Add me to the list of other band members. Tuba. Another instrument that only plays quarter notes in that horrible tune. (Actually, the original Pomp and Circumstance is a pretty great piece of music, it’s just been watered down and stripped of anything fun for high school bands.)
Sadly, I now teach music at a high school and have to teach it to the band… AND orchestra. Happily, I’m the assistant director and I don’t have to go to the graduation ceremony.
I can think of worse: it’s a nightmare organising them. I had to do it for a university. We did at least split them up so each one wouldn’t last too long, and on the whole they seemed to go pretty well. But it was just about the last straw in persuading me to change careers.
PS: we ended up using recorded music for the in and out processions, one short speech only, and kept the graduands moving when their time came. Applause for each one was fine but no-one got much of a chance to milk it.
Come to think of it, I still occasionally hear a piece of music and think “We should have had that for the processions”.
Anyone remember the episode of The Cosby Show, where they essentially showed a graduation ceremony? I couldn’t imagine a more boring subject matter.
Man - college graduation, HS graduation, dance recital - tough to choose. I think College grad is the worst, because it is more impersonal. At a dance recital, at least you have a brief opportunity to see your kid do something. And a HS graduation has the possibility of spontaneity. But the large college graduations I have sat through have just been uninterrupted impersonal tedium.
As an Uncle, I got lots of brownie points by volunteering to give up my ticket and stay home, getting things ready for the graduation party afterwards.
Sitting in an air-conditioned house on the lake shore, watching hotdishes bake in the oven, letting the dogs out, etc. was a whole lot more enjoyable.
My little brother got his in a beautiful ancient chapel of a very famous UK university. All very prestigious and picture-book, gowns, lawns, church. The whole family went as he was the first in the family to go somewhere like that…
Fucking Latin! pretty much the whole bloody thing. Several hours later I have never wanted a drink so much in my life.
One the other hand, my wife got hers in pretty swift order at the Royal Festival Hall, south-bank London.
Arrive, gowned, walk across stage, get scroll, get photo taken, off to pub. All done in an hour flat and backed by the magnificent Festival hall organ booming out a selection of classical favourites
June 6th will be my 32nd high school graduation ceremony. Quit your whining.
Yes I could never stand them. The horrific cliches, feel-good messages, platitude speeches that say nothing of importance or are else peppered with the speaker’s own agenda. And taking hours and hours, and every students’ ego.
pretty much any ceremony commemorating anything is just as bad. Invariably they have too many speakers giving speeches which are at least 4 times as long as they need to be. I know they love to hear the sound of their own voices, but after about a half hour of blather you’ve totally lost the room.
I worked security at the local votech graduation one year. The votech should be where high school age kids that don’t want to go to college learn a trade. Too often it’s for bad kids that aren’t quite bad enough for other types of “academies.”
So as the guest speaker they got a local cable news anchor. He was told to keep his remarks brief, no more than 10-15 minutes. They kids and many of the parents did not have long attention spans. He did not go 10 or 15 minutes. As we got close to the 1 hour mark the level of tension in the room was palpable. He was not unaware of it. He heard the murmurs and commented about it. He would say things like “I’m Baptist and we sometimes have 3 hour sermons so get used to it.” He put everyone through torture. I curse him every time I see him on tv.
The Army has a lot of ceremonies. They certainly can be torturous. Every change of command or transfer of authority had a ceremony. On one deployment I had a commanding general who decreed that all ceremonies were to be no longer than 15 minutes. Remarks from colonel and above, no more than 2 minutes. LTC and below 1 minute. Those ceremonies were well oiled machines. Over and done with and out of the sun. That was a great general.
About a year ago I attended a h.s. grad where Lauren Graham (of Gilmour Girls infamy) was the keynote speaker. It was an endless stream of narcissism and public therapy. A moment came half way through the interminable speech when you realized the entire hall was stunned into silence by the medicated train-wreck at the podium. Parting words of wisdom were irrelevant because the underlying message came across that, if you’re popular, pretty, in theater class and not the least bit self-aware, you too can be a needy, attention starved teenage girl trapped in a 40-something validation seeking adult body.
When I was in grad school at U of Florida, a colleague said that his parents were coming in for his graduation. I commented that me and my family would probably be at a bar during my graduation ceremony. He laughed. A couple of days later, he said that he thought about what I had said. He said that he and his parents were going to skip the graduation ceremony and go to St. Augustine, FL, instead.
No, there isn’t. Which is why, when I heard they were shoving dancing kids off the stage a couple weeks ago, I was cheering vicariously for the audience. If every kid did that it would have been 8 hours long.