I know, it’s one of those dumb specific questions. And I need answer fast, 'cause I’m going out of town tomorrow.
I have a Canon PowerShot Elph SD1000, which has a rechargeable battery. It keeps a charge so long that I lost the charger. I can’t source one locally (and if I could it would be really expensive.) Is there a universal charger I could find widely available that would work? Are those things safe?
You need a CB2-LV charger, which you can buy at B&H Photo for 39.95 or from Sterling Tek for 17.99.
Sterling Tek is a good company, I use their replacement batteries for my Canon DSLRs.
Yeah, but I’m leaving tomorrow. 
I need something I can get at Best Buy or Radio Shack or some place that’s going to be open after 6 on a Friday.
Sorry, I missed the part about NEED ANSWER FAST. 
I seriously doubt you’d be able to find something compatible. Pocket camera batteries come in too many shapes and types. But if there’s a Radio Shack near you it might be worth a shot.
I’ll try - Radio Shack used to have that kind of stuff, along with friendly knowledgeable people. Now it seems they just sell cell phones.
I have a Canon SD 800-is that uses the same batteries. I’ve used my MAHA universal charger for my Canon batts and about 50 other batteries around the house. It’s a great investment that I use all the time and the OP might be able to find one locally in time.
The guys at Radio Shack were, shockingly, super-helpful. They showed me a universal charger and figured out exactly where the thing had to go (which was really complicated) in the store and sent it home with me with the battery in place.