Is there such a thing as rich people toilet paper

Rich people have their own versions of a lot of things. I’m wondering if there is a super high quality toilet paper that rich people (or at the very least, upper middle class people) buy.

I’ve always been pretty happy with charmin and cottonelle, I’m wondering if there is some higher end toilet paper. Not higher end because it has gold flakes built into it, more higher end because it doesn’t rip as much, it absorbs better, doesn’t flake, softer, etc.

Looking online, supposedly there are 3 or 4 ply quilted TP that is higher quality, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen it in stores. Either I never looked for it or the stores I visit don’t carry it. Maybe I shouldn’t buy TP at the gas station across the street from the welfare office.

Like this stuff, I’ve never seen it in stores.


If you build it, they will come. Fancy “toilet paper” in the U.S. isn’t toilet paper at all. It is a bidet or smart toilet.

Glad to see you back.

I’m not so much talking about artisanal toilet paper as much as toilet paper that is extremely high quality. Very soft, absorbant and rip proof.

I’ve considered a bidet, but for whatever reason I’ve always worried about it causing a water leak.

I love my bidet
bidet dreams

I’m sure that there are lots of things that you could make out of rich people.

There’s bamboo toilet paper. It’s pricey. Not sure if it’s any better. (:))

The really rich don’t use paper. They use 500-thread-count satin, velvet, or silk. And they have servants to wipe for them.

I only have 300 thread count satin.

Since COVID-19, toilet paper IS rich people toilet paper.

I thought rich people wiped themselves with twenties.

Rabelais says the neck of a goose is heavenly, but I’ve found them difficult to hold on to and they tend to honk a lot.

Depends on whether you wipe with the grain or against the grain of feathers.

Also, men especially, make sure the goose is right-side up and facing backwards.

Well, I have experienced really high quality toilet paper but I’ve not found it in the U.S. I have looked. I’ve run across the stuff several times times in France. Even us women really only need one or two squares. But I do wonder how their sewer and septic systems handle the stuff.

(As an aside: I’ve also experienced stretchy toilet paper. In the portaloo at the Long Beach Grand Prix, the paper they use has stretch. They’re so doggone bodycon that even the loo role has spandex. :D)

As quoted by the Master in 1986:

I bet $8.99 for six rolls seemed a lot more ridiculous last year. I’ve seen single rolls marked up as high as €3 recently.

Huh. And here I always thought rich people’s toilet paper was $100 bills.

Three Batarangs? That’s crazy!

There’s rich, and then there’s super-rich.

If by some crazed, misguided chance Chump ever gets his mug on a bill, I’ll be using that to wipe my ass.