The other day, trump compared himself to George Bailey, the kind hearted doormat protagonist of It’s A Wonderful Life. Naturally, Jimmy Stewart’s daughter took him to task, noting that George was everything trump is not.
But I say, let’s look closer. Let’s look under the surface. Imagine the comparison is correct.
Since I can’t do those fun and clever movie trailer parodies in video, you’ll have to read this and imagine it a trailer.
[Voice over] He’s a bully…
George Bailey: [in drug store]…don’t like coconuts? Say, brainless, don’t you know where coconuts come from? Look at here. From [dubbed over] Nambia, Squeegie Islands, Covfefe Sea!
Pete Bailey [at home]: Daddy, the Brown’s next door have a new car. You should see it.
George Bailey : [yelling]Well, what’s the matter with our car? Isn’t it good enough for you?
Pete: [head down] Yes, Daddy.
[Scene in Bedford Falls where George smugly lords his “power” as Air Raid warden over a homeowner]
Geoirge Bailey [at home, yells at kids]: How should I know? What do you think I am, a dictionary? Tommy, stop that, stop it! Janie, haven’t you learned that silly tune yet? You play it over and over again. Now stop it! Stop!
George Bailey: [on phone]Say, what kind of a teacher are you anyway? What do you mean sending her home like that, half naked? Do you realize she’ll probably end up with pneumonia on account of you? Is this the sort of thing we pay taxes for - to have teachers…to have teachers like you? Stupid, silly, careless people who send our kids home without any clothes on?
[V/O] Pretends to support the police, but really doesn’t…
[Scene where George belts Bert the cop]
[V/O] Has delusions of his own worth, believes he is deserving of “special” treatment…
Mary Hatch:[in drugstore] A new magazine! I never saw it before.
George Bailey: Of course you never. Only us explorers can get it. I’ve been nominated for membership in the National Geographic Society.
[V/O] Believes things should be just given to him…
George Bailey [drugstore]: I wish I had a million dollars…
[V/O] destroys anything he doesn’t own or control…
George Bailey: OK then, I’ll throw a rock at the old Granville house.
[V/O] A terrible business man…
George Bailey:… between you and me Mr. Carter we’re broke.
George Bailey: Look, we’re still in business, we’ve got two bucks left!
Mr. Potter: You misplaced eight thousand dollars?
[V/O] Actually has no head for business at all…
Sam Wainright: Jane, I offered to let George in on the ground floor in plastics and he turned me down cold.
George Bailey: Now, you listen to me! I don’t want any plastics, and I don’t want any ground floors,
[V/O] has no idea where money even comes from…
George Bailey: A toast! A toast to Mama Dollar and to Papa Dollar, and if you want to keep this old Building and Loan in business, you better have a family real quick.
[V/O] He’s a serial sexual assaulter…
Mary: He’s making violent love to me!
Violet Bick** : [being dragged into a squad car by police] That sailor’s a liar!
George Bailey [ on Mary being caught naked in the bushes after her robe slips off ] This is a very interesting situation!
Mary: Please give me my robe.
George Bailey: A man doesn’t get in a situation like this every day.
Mary: I’d like to have my robe.
George Bailey: Maybe I can sell tickets.
Mr. Potter: Is it a woman, then? You know, it’s all over town that you’ve been giving money to [Stormy Daniels].
[V/O] Acts inappropriately around underaged girls…
George Bailey: [ to Mary ] You look older without your clothes on.
George Bailey: You want me to kiss her, huh?
[V/O] Is not liked by anyone…
Clarence: So… killing yourself would make everyone feel happier…
[image of George, with Potter’s voice over]…most people hate me. But I don’t like them either so that makes it all even.
George Bailey: And that goes for you, too!
[V/O] Installs unqualified family members in key positions…
George Bailey: [ yelling at Uncle Billy ] Where’s that money, you silly stupid old fool? Where’s that money? Do you realize what this means? It means bankruptcy and scandal and prison! That’s what it means! One of us is going to jail; well, it’s not gonna be me!
[V/O] A con man…
George Bailey: No, but you…you…you’re thinking of this place all wrong. As if I had the money back in a safe. The, the money’s not here. Well, your money’s in Joe’s house…that’s right next to yours. And in the Kennedy House, and Mrs. Macklin’s house, and, and a hundred others. Why, you’re lending them the money to build, and then, they’re going to pay it back to you as best they can.
Mr. Potter: They’re going to believe that one. What’ve you been doing, George? Playing the market with the company’s money?
George Bailey: What is it you want, Mary? What do you want? You want the moon? Just say the word and I’ll throw a lasso around it and pull it down.
[V/O] only escapes jail because he corrupts the authorities…
Mary: I’ll call the police!
George Bailey: They’d be on my side.
[image of DA tearing up George’s arrest warrant.]
[V/O] And he only evades bankruptcy by an infusion of outside capital of questionable legitimacy …
George Bailey: I’m in trouble, Mr. [Putin]. I need help. Through some sort of an accident, my company’s short in their accounts. The bank examiner got there today. I’ve got to raise eight [hundred million] dollars immediately.
George Bailey: Please help me, Mr. [Putin]. Help me, won’t you, please? Can’t you see what it means to my family? I’ll pay any sort of a bonus on the loan, any interest, if you still want the [United States]…
Mary: I feel like a bootlegger’s wife!
[V/O] but he’s still your President!
Coming this Christmas, the best movie in the history of the world, breaking box office records even before it is released, the republican feel good movie of the year, from Fox News Studios, the true story of Donald J Trump:
[important Voice over]
Many People, Many, Come Up to Me and Tell Me, Sir, You Have the Bigliest Life!
Clarence: [ In book inscription ] Remember, [Donald]: no man is a failure who has friends.
[image of book being thrown away]
[text on screen] Because you’ll buy anything!