It's almost Groundhog Day! Let's pick someone to trap in a time warp.

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

After years of arduous research, a perilous quest in which I died and was resurrected four times, and the requisite lesbian sacrifice, I have discovered the text of the mystic enchantment that afflicted Phil Conners (as recorded in the documentary mistaken for a feature film starring Bill Murray & Andie McDowell). Yes, I have the ability to trap any one person in a time loop, forced to repeat one day until they get it right–i.e., until they undergo a profound and life-altering change in personality.

There’s only one problem. The spell only works on Groundhog Day, and I don’t know who to perform it on. Thus I need nominations. Time’s a wasting, as we must also contrive to get the victim to the proper locale by Monday.

Please name the person you wish to trap in the warp, where s/he should be trapped, and what lesson, once learned, will break the cycle.

2

Colonel Claus von Stauffenberg, the officer portrayed by Tom Cruise in the movie Valkyrie.

There’s a man who deserves a second chance, and a third, fourth, fifth, etc. until he gets it right.

BTW, it’s weirdo posts like these that make me love the Dope.

3

O J Simpson trapped in June 12, 1994 to be released only when he caught at Bundy with the bloody knife.

4

On second thought, Col. von Stauffenberg doesn’t really meet the OP’s requirements. Hmm…

How about Colin Powell and his justification of the Iraq War to the UN? He has to keep repeating until he acquires the cojones needed to give a sincere, objective presentation.

5

I’d nominate the American People on February 2, 1998 or so just to improve the economy, but it’d make Punxsatawney a bit crowded.

Sorry.

Robin

6

The victims need not be trapped in Punxsatawney, but as I’d be one of those trapped it’s clearly not gonna happen. Obviously I have to be outside the loop to make sure it terminates. :smiley:

Seems cruel. He doesn’t deserve the frustration he’s going to undergo.

7

Who says the loop needs to be terminated? If I can refine the nomination, I’d like it to be the period before Clinton’s, ah, indiscretions and while the economy was awesome.

Good times, good times.

Robin

8

I didn’t realize it was a Feb-2 only one-day-loop kind of thing you had in mind. I was going to suggest that the former president, GWB, be invited to revisit the years 2004-2008 in an endless loop.

(Of course he may be doing that already)

9

Hey, I didn’t write the spell. Obviously if I had I would not have had to do the research, undergo the death & resurrection, or sacrifice Lindsay Lohan to Artemis.

10

I elect Barack Obama. He relives this Monday over and over until he is able to solve the problems of our economy, brings peace to the middle east, brings to justice all domestic purveyors of enhanced interrogation, makes us energy independent, and brings home a puppy for his daughters. As it turns out the last one was what he needed to do to break the curse, but the rest is good gravy and we as a nation can then get on with our lives, which will mainly consist of burning wall street executives in effigy and eating Cheetos.

11

Ron.

12

Since Feb. 2 is also (one of) the traditional dates of Candlemas, where

I therefore propose that anyone with Christmas decorations still up be stuck on Feb. 2 until they take them down.

13

I think the World would vote for Bush to be put into a permament loop until he finds the WMDs in Iraq. :rolleyes:

14

I’d have Bush relive Obama’s inauguration day forever. No getting it right in the end, just an endless loop of having to silently watch a beloved public figure take office while the crowd mocks him.