A man was caught having sex with his goat. Jethro (we’ll call him) called his buddy who clerked for SCOTUS, and begged for a couple of good lawyer recommendations. His buddy had two suggestions- one was a killer during cross examination and final argument and wanted $50K, the other was the best in the world at jury selection, but only cost $25K. Jethro choose the cheaper lawyer. The DA brought the Sheriff, Deputies and a coupel next-door neighbors up, whose testimony was damning. Jethro’s $25K lawyer hardly cross-examined at all. Jethro figured he was royally fucked. The final argument were being said, and the DA thundered out: *"…and to top this off, this man has his goat lick him clean after sex!" * Jethro put his hands on his face and prepared for a long prison term, until he heard one juror mutter to another “Ya know, a good goat’ll do thet for ya.”
Dopers- if your apple pie tastes like pussy, I suggest you use a different type of canned apple filling. *Don’t * use the funny little oblong flat cans that come with keys, and pictures of men in So’westers on them.
[QUOTE=lieu]
I liked it better back when “Who’s fucked a deer?” was a rhetorical question.
[/QUOTE]
Or “Which deer do I need to fuck to get some service around here?”
[QUOTE=SandyHook]
Just a cotton-pickin’ minute. I think we’re all assuming it was a female deer.
[/QUOTE]
Having **gay **sex with a dead animal? now, *that *is just sick!
[QUOTE=Mindfield]
“Doc, I got this terrible aching in my loins. I think that deer gave me something. Can deer get syphilis?”
[/QUOTE] Yes.
I’ve also heard of bears having syphilis.
[QUOTE=pulykamell]
At the risk of asking something stupid, if some guy wants to have sex with a dead deer or frozen chicken, why should I/we care?
[/QUOTE]
Well, that is potentially a way to discover new and exciting diseases the hard way. I do recall reading a story about a fellow who got in major trouble with his wife when she dragged him to the doctor to find out what made him sick, and it turned out he got it from screwing the sheep. On a more serious note, one theory for the origin of AIDS is that somebody in Africa decided to screw a HIV infected green monkey.
