Next Sunday A.D., scientists using advanced technology discover an impending catastrophe heading towards Earth, fast. Maybe it’s a Gamma Ray Burst, asteroid or comet - the details are trivial. The long and short is, we’re all going to die, and soon. There is no defence, no time to prepare. We have no more than a week left.
Two questions - first, would you want to know? Should the public be informed if there’s nothing we can do? I know there’s been prior topics on this subject, but I want to go further into detail.
Second, what do you do with the last few days?
Me, I’d probably devote my last days to finding as many good times as I could find. I’d want to know about it, too - despite the mass panic and chaos, at least let us squeeze the most out of the final days. Poll inbound, as I love dem polls.
I would spend most of my time digging deep and bunkering in. I know you said no defence. But I would try anyway. I do not.care what the impending doom was. I wont just lay there without a fight.
There will be peanty of time for screwin and drinking in my bunker full of women, booze, guns and food.
I’d take my pets and go visit my grandmother in the nursing home, camping out there until the end. We’d talk and reminisce and pray. If anyone’s prayers could make a difference it would be those of my grandmother. I mean, I’d pray too, but just for an escape from pain.
Thursday morning a great voice comes down from the sky, heard and understood by everyone on earth. It says, “I’ve had it with you Earthlings. Tomorrow at 5:00 PM the Earth is going to be destroyed, and living thing on it is going to die!”
Headlines on the morning papers Friday:
Wall Street Journal; “World to end this afternoon. Markets to close early.”
New York Times; “World to end this afternoon. Details on page C53.”
Washington Post; “World to end this afternoon. Women and minorities hit hardest.”
Yes, I would definitely want to know. So I can [del]eat lots and lots of Ben and Jerry’s[/del] hold my children close and tell them I love them. I would want to be informed first. Otherwise all the Ben and Jerry’s is going to be gone before I get to it.
I’d go out and buy a couple quarts of scotch, drink myself silly, gather my pets around me and read the Straight Dope 'till it happens. And hope the end won’t be painful.
Actually, guys, it’s the end of the world every day…for somebody. And they don’t necessarily know about it beforehand. Every life ends between the last step and the next.
That’s why I go for quality of life instead of quantity. I try not to deprive myself unless it hurts somebody else—or makes too big of a mess. lol
Because of past losses I pretty much try to stay in tune with my family so there’s no unfinished business to haunt me. Every day I do something that pleases me because I decided to be selfish that way.
I have no desire to “add years to my life” because that’s tacking on time to when I’m old—not in my 30s or 40s when I could have done such & such. I’d rather eat a real egg and drink a real beer now than to be lying in a bed with a tube in every orifice trying to convince myself that doing without was worth it. In fact, the older I get the more I find myself regreting the things I didn’t do rather than the things I did, even if they were wrong.
So in a way I try to remember that today COULD be the end of “my” world and dance and play as much as possible, without totally neglecting my responsibilities. As with anything, though, all things in moderation.
Makes you live longer.
I would want to know. I would not go back to work and spend my final days making phone calls to my long-distance friends (no friends or family locally), letting them know I love them. I would spoil my pets rotten those last days, splurging on the best, tastiest food for all of us that I could get. And we would meet the end together, all of us gathered in my bed, their favorite place in the world.
Basically, the Sheen plan: Hookers and blow. (well, maybe not blow, but I would spend as much as possible on intoxicants.)
Also not hookers. But I would basically come straight out and proposition all the women I know who flirt jokingly with me and see how far it goes. There won’t be another chance, right? Lord knows I’ve made that mistake by not giving it a shot too many times in my life already .
Yes, I’m a sinner. But I’m going to die anyway so there’s no time to repent.
