I actually got paid twenty bucks for a limerick, once. It was a long time ago and the magazine has gone out of print. (Not my fault.)
A sorcerous vampire, Thume,
Took a succubus up to his room
Where they argued all night
Over who had the right
To drain away what, and from whom.
(And if you don’t think it’s worth twenty bucks, that’s not my fault, either.)
Wow! Nice boobies.
You had a crap day?
Does that mean you gave a shit or that you took one?
There once was a lim’rick with one line.
-D/a
For bad days, I always prescribe a box of kittens.
That reminds me of one my friend posted the other day:
What do we want?
A cure for tourette’s!
When do we want it?
Cunt!
Do you hope the DJ’s gonna play your favoritesong?
Aren’t you a red-head? Here: Tim Michin singing “Prejudice”
There was an unstoppable meme
Begun on the Straight Dope t’would seem
The lim’ricks they’d write
Were never quite right
And all because some sheepfucker had a bad day!
I’ve had my share of harsh days lately too. Hang in there.