Firstly, it’s not enough that I paid an outrageous (to me) amount of money for three measly tables that 1) I have to drive over and pick up from the warehouse myself; and 2) I actually have to build once I get the box home. So the outrageous amount of money doesn’t even include the labor cost to construct my furniture, I have to do that myself.
But then … why is there so much freakin’ styrofoam in this stupid packing box? Gaaahhh! I hate styrofoam! The little styrofoam bits get EVERYWHERE! Then I have to break the slabs of white, crumbly, messy stuff down so I can throw them away. Because you can’t recycle the shit. It’s not in convenient shapes for me to use myself, even if I had the space to store it until I could use it. It’s just taking up space waiting to go to the landfill.
And then, even with the acres of styrofoam included in this packing box, one of the furniture pieces still was scratched. So now I have to wait for the store to re-order my table top before I can finish with my “value added” labor and get this job done.
Not only that, but now I have to PAY MORE MONEY to have that crap thrown away. You see, we pay a set monthly fee to the city for our water, sewer and garbage. Cedar Rapids is pretty good, in that they include curbside recycling and lawn waste pickup, too, so that’s nice. But the fee only allows one (city-provided, wheeled … did I mention they’re pretty good in this department?) garbage container per week. Any additional bags, I have to buy a sticker for. And I have to buy stickers for this big pile of styrofoam crap! So, friendly furniture retailer, perhaps you should include my labor cost to build your stupid tables, my gas cost to deliver them to myself, and the garbage fee to THROW AWAY YOUR STINKIN’ STYROFOAM in your “lowlowlow” total cost. Gaahhh!
And another thing! How can styrofoam be this miracle substance that actually EXPANDS IN SIZE the more you break it up? I go from a few thin sheets in my furniture packing box, to two-plus garbage bags straining to hold the jagged chunks of the Devil’s bedsheets. How the hell did that happen? Doesn’t that violate the laws of physics? Oh, Ernst Stavro Styro, I hate you and your stupid invention so much!
Plus, when you rub two pieces of styrofoam together, it really makes my teeth hurt.
I hate styrofoam.