James O'Keefe is at it again.

Let me be clear, here. O’Keefe is the prison-rape-with-AIDS-and-colon-rupturing in this analogy, right?

Well, if you want to honor O’Keefe with a comparison far above his status, sure.

Maybe, but I prefer heroin.

Can somebody explain what the point O’Keefe was even attempting to make here? He was pretending that he had backers for an anti-fracking movie. I’m assuming most of these movie people are publicly opposed to fracking. So what did O’Keefe prove? That these people follow their beliefs?

If he had gone around offering these same people a million dollars to make a pro-fracking movie and they had accepted, he’d have shown they were hypocrites - but that’s not what happened.

I guess O’Keefe’s supposed point was that these people were allegedly willing to accept money from Middle Eastern sources. So? Lots of people do business with Middle Easterners.

I’m with you. Even the edited version of this thing doesn’t seem in any way scandalous.

“Middle-Eastern” is shorthand for oil money. He’s trying to prove (and understand, I’m using a very loose definition of the word “prove” that fell off a truck) that all environmentalists everywhere are actually in Big Oil’s pocket, possibly in bed with terrists as well, and that in turn means eco-friendly is bad and fracking is all-American and good because THERE ARE ONLY TWO SIDES.

If you like heroin more than confirmation bias, well…I guess you really really like heroin.

Perhaps not, but many do, apparently they won’t listen to anybody else.

Never touch CB. I know the nature of the beast too well to be suckered by it. But be my guest if you wish to see it everywhere you look … wait a minute, there’s a name for that, isn’t there?

Fracking, O’Keefe would have us believe, would end our dependence on OPEC. There’s so much magical oil in shale that we could all bathe in it, but OPEC’s trying to keep true patriots from knowing the truth. Nobody wants to actually stop fracking to improve the environment, it’s actually just to keep America suckling at the Middle Eastern teat.

It sounds like they made a hidden camera video, which always looks suspicious, declared it controversial and hypocritical and hoped no one noticed that it was neither.

Its like watching a coke-head deny his habit when there is white powder still on his nose.

I can HANDLE it, man!

Well, yeah. Because the people they’ll be frantically forward-emailing that story to over the next fourty years won’t. And these people vote.

Ah, there’s nothing like wit! And that certainly is nothing like wit.

If your ability to recognize wit is comparable to your astounding lack of self-awareness, I’m not too concerned.

[bites powdered-sugar donut] Mmph?

And if you really believe that was wit then … oh shit we could keep this up till kingdom come. Flyting I believe is the old term. Life is too short and at my back I always hear, etc. God speed.

We could go faster, but we keep hoping you’ll catch up.

Actors should shut up because they’re stupid and rich and they’re only good for being your monkey. Dance, monkey, dance! They are no different from people who actually lie to you when they try to draw attention to a matter of social importance that concerns them. I already know everything every actor knows so why do I always hear about them talking about things? Fuck you, actors! You dumb!