Jewel Eye: Staring down the beryl (July Mini-Rants)

A macaroon.

A macaroon maroon…dancing the macaroni macarena???

Why yes, that was one of my screen savers back in the day.

I had never seen nor heard of that when it was current. Thank you. I think.

Me, neither. I feel … amused, but confused.

I was sitting there working on a video late last night when everything went dark; power outage. Okay, given the time, I’ll just go to bed…but, I don’t know where my phone is. I’ve taken to using that as the emergency flashlight but I don’t know where it is in the dark. (I found it the second place I put my hand down). I go upstairs & it’s hot. I realize that I can’t put on the ceiling fan w/o power so I think I’ll grab the air mattress & sleep out on the deck…except I can’t inflate the air mattress w/o electricity. D’Oh!
I don’t know how much got auto-saved / how much I’ll need to redo until I get a chance to boot it again tonight.

Get a foot pump !

… or lungs.

Foot lungs can work but if your leg gets tired you asphyxiate so I don’t recommend it.

People, there’s this great big sign saying that no dogs are allowed on the beach. You don’t even have to know how to read. The sign has a picture of a dog with a red circle and a bar through it.

It was a reasonably well behaved dog. It wasn’t running into the area that was marked off as nesting area for sea birds or anything. But really, if you are going to let your dog run off leash in a no dogs allowed area, at least pick up your shit!

Dang, they let the dog run all over but it was the owners shitting all over the place.

Irony!

I’m not really sure what we’re doing in therapy. I believe she’s probably the most qualified to rule in/rule out autism, which is my whole point in seeing her, as well as hoping to get some help managing my ADHD. But she’s psychodynamic, which is not really my jam, and today she had me “tapping” which as far as I can tell is complete bullshit.

She keeps asking me what I want to work on and I keep telling her I need help managing my life due to a devastating loss of executive function apparently driven by perimenopause, and then she asks me shit that has nothing to do with any of that. Although on one level I get it, if she’s doing an evaluation she needs to have the full picture including a history.

Today I talked mostly about all the times I’ve fucked up socially and all the jobs I’ve fucked up, which was really very demoralizing, and then she’s like, “write down three positive things about yourself every day.”

Uhhhh kinda finding that hard to reach for after enumerating all my failures.

I wasn’t exactly doing great prior to seeing her, so it’s too early to really tell if I’m worse off now, but it’s definitely dredging up stuff that makes me feel bad about myself. It’s probably going to be months to make a determination about a diagnosis, so I guess I’d better get used to it.

They do say that dogs come to resemble their people. And vice versa.

It took about 3 tries to hit the urinal properly with a leg lift but now I can’t remember any other way to do it.

So you prefer pointers to setters?

Dachshund!

Is Instacart not a thing where you are?

Bless you.

I bought one when I got the first air mattress. Experience taught me to go out & buy an electric pump. I may still have it in the house, but of course, if I do, it’s buried in the basement, which would require some lights to go look for it.

Didn’t Dachshund change its name to Niss-hound?

That took me a second to get. Nice.