Job Interviewer: So, Peter, where do you see yourself in five years?
Voice in Peter Griffin’s Head: Don’t say, “Doin’ your wife!” Don’t say, “Doin’ your wife!”
Peter: Doin’ your… (looks at family photo on desk) …son?
I think I’d have told her I was wearing women’s underwear, smiled, and said “Just kidding.”
A guy I met on a hiking trip told me about his interviews for Oxford. He walked into the Dean’s office (or whoever was conducting) and the guy said “Amuse me”, openened up the newspaper with a flourish, held it up so he couldn’t see my friend and began to read.
My friend sat there stunned for a second, then reached in his pocket, pulled out his cigarette lighter, reached over and lit the bottom of the Dean’s newspaper on fire.
You guessed it… he was to start in the Fall.
That’s my standard wrap-up question too. With any luck, by the end of an interview, candidates have a fair feel for what we’re looking for. They may have something relevant to add that the interview questions didn’t cover…or the person was simply nervous and forgot to mention. That happens.
I doubt very much it was all that significant in the final decision, Zev. The pisser with interviews is that you don’t have a chance to weigh your competition. (Well, besides the fact that they’re nerve wracking and hell on the ego.) In all probability someone else just had a combination of skills and experience that fit closer to what they were looking for. IME most interviewers are too focused on the process for mind games, and you wouldn’t want to work for anyone who played subtle intimidation tactics in an interview anyway.
It’ll happen, Zev. You didn’t do anything “wrong”. Hang in there.
Veb
My wife was asked that question at the end of her job interview, and her answer was, “I’d like you to know that I honor my commitments.” It got her the job because they were having trouble with commuters who didn’t show up or came in late.
Good one Winston – I try to work the phrase “shot a man in Reno” into as many conversations as I can.
Another: “Does your company press charges?” (paraphrased from Jack Handy’s Deep Thoughts).
And as another HR person (retired) let me counter this by saying that had I heard someone using that particular phrasing, I’d think that the asker didn’t have a lot of interviewing experience.
“Is there anything we haven’t covered?”
“Was there anything you’d like to add?”
“Did you have any questions or anything more you’d like for me to know?”
“Now that you’ve seen our offices/labs/facilities/manufacturing line, did you have any observations that you’d like to share, or any questions about anything?”
Those were my typical interview closers, and the usually garnered great results. If someone answered “Was there anything you’d like to add?” with a “No, I think we’ve covered everything.” and they’d been really recalcitrant and tight-lipped about themselves and their qualifications throughout the entire interview, they had just told me everything I needed to know. If the interview had been really thorough and pleasant, it also told me everything I needed to know.
“Do you have anything you’d like to tell me?” comes across, to me, as a challenge. It’s the sort of thing a parent says to a child when the parent has found evidence of some wrongdoing that the child is unaware has been discovered. With the addend “about (insert subject here)?” it’s a standard line of dialogue on TV cop shows. Even if I did have evidence that the interviewee was withholding some important information from me, such a blunt question is not likely to engender trust or elicit an admission about that information. More often than not, even in an interviewee who has nothing to hide, it’s going to provoke a warning bell, followed by a quick disclaimer or a clam-up. It doesn’t do any good.
It’s a subtle matter of phrasing, but interviews are (at least for HR people) often about subtleties and nuances. Or at least they should be.
I’m not saying that your interviewer, Zev, was trying to catch you in some kind of lame “gotcha ya!” manuever. Just that she’s not got a good way with words. I doubt that it was why you weren’t hired – if it was, I’d say it probably wasn’t somewhere you’d want to be over the long term anyway.
I agree with TeaElle. The interviewer phrased a standard closing question in a weird way - as if she knew something about you and wanted to see if you’d tell her. She surely meant, “Do you have anything else to add that we didn’t cover,” etc., but phrasing it the way she did is off-putting and odd.
“I have been secretly masturbating for the duration of the interview.”
I got that same question for the first time when I was being interviewed not long ago for this job I now have editing a newspaper. I probably should point out I wasn’t entirely certain that I wanted the job so I wasn’t taking it overly seriously. Now that I think about it, I generally don’t take job interviews seriously - I wonder if that is a defense mechanism?
Anyway my response was, “Well, I am the fourth best newspaper man in the United States.”
“What?” said the interviewer. I actually got her to look up from the form of hers and look at me with something other than that “I don’t know what you do but I’m more important than you” look.
“Well I said ‘fourth’ because I thought you might want me to show some humility,” I answered with a smile. She then gave me a look that said I was not only not very important but was clearly a potential candidate to show up carrying an AK-47 after a bad week of letters to the editor.
However, about a week later the president of the publishing firm called me and offered me the job (I should point out this is a guy who wears baseball caps for Japanese baseball teams with suits [he’s not Japanese] and periodically sends ice cream sandwiches to the entire staff for no particular reason.
TV
“I’m a Charter Member of the SDMB. Neener, neener, neener!!!”
The following alternative forms of the question, posted by TeaElle are very good.
This type of question gives you an opportunity to explain some things that the interviewer can’t legally ask:
Questions such as: “Zev, you are nearly 60 years old. We need to hire someone who expects to work for several more years. How much longer do you intend to work?” or
“Cathy, you are a single mom with small children, how will you manage to attend training sessions that require overnight travel?” are illegal.
The anything that a 60 year-old Zev might like to tell is that he’s in good health and expects to continue to work for a considerable length of time. Cathy could state that travel is no problem for her.
In short, the person being interviewed can use this question to volunteer information that the interviewer can’t legally ask. The question can work to the applicant’s advantage if they are prepared for it.
Such a question is your time to add any information about yourself that might not be apparent on your resume or have been brought up during the interview.
I sometimes interpret as “I don’t know how to interview so I’m hoping you’ll just talk a lot about yourself”.
An interview is not just answering questions as they are fielded to you. It’s your chance to sell yourself to your potential employer.
“I’m excited about the opportunity to work here and I’d really like to have this job.”
Or: “My last HR director told me I was hung like Mr. Ed. Care for a look-see?”
YES!
This is your chance to express why you’re the guy for the job. And you should ALWAYS say the magic words “I want this job.” somewhere in there.
You’d be amazed how many people I’ve interviewed never actually get around to that. And just assuming that it’s agreed upon because you’re interviewing isn’t as good as actually saying it.