And then there was the small grocery store where I used to stop most days on the way home from work, pick up a few things for supper and a daily paper. Small place, only 3 or 4 checkouts, and often only one open. Hers. That awful woman who would ring up my items until she got to my newspaper. And every time she’d stop working the cash register and stand there reading my paper. On a good day she’d just skim the front page. Other times something would catch her eye and she’d have to turn to the inside pages to follow up. Meanwhile I’d stand there rippling my jaw muscles and doing deep-breathing exercises. FINALLY she’d glance up at me with an “Oh, were you waiting” look, and finish making the sale. Sheesh lady!!! they’re only 50 cents…buy your own damn paper and read it on your break!
This was the same lady that, would be carrying on a mundane pointless conversation with another employee when I came to her checkout, and would continue to talk, ignoring me, then finally give that same insolent “oh, were you waiting” look. I’m convinced this was fully intentional on her part… a deliberate passive/aggressive move.
I’m actively considering a rude option right now. Instead, I think I’ll mention that, when it comes to social behavior, it’s the behavior that counts - not the number of rude/violent/bizarre/other ideas that occur to you and get discarded.
It boggles my mind that so many people don’t get that non-talkers don’t enjoy chatty/intrusive cashiers, but probably don’t act rudely towards them; instead they come here and bitch in an appropriate thread. I can do idle chit-chat just fine; I just don’t want to.
One thing to bear in mind is that most cashiers simply won’t remember you the moment you walk out the door, unless you’ve purchased something really weird (and a few bottles of booze doesn’t count) or did something to make them remember you (like getting really paranoid when the cashier checks to see if the name on the credit card matches the signature or something like that).
So even if you are an alkie who plans to drink until you can’t feel feelings anymore all on your own, the cashier doesn’t actually care unless you do something like loudly announce how drunk you’re going to get with all this cheap grog you’re buying, or crack it open as soon as it’s been scanned and start drinking it, or something like that.
But…it’s not that complicated. I’m a non-talker, and I know how it works. If another person engages words, you say words that don’t mean anything when the other guy stops talking, and then wait for him to do the same, and then repeat until the interaction is over and you can scuttle off. Not that complicated.
Is that what he said? Because I missed it. All his answers were, at worst, social “white” lies., and quite possibly honest statements of fact. (I first read the “my friends LOVE it” as a literal statement without a patronizing tone. But I see how the caps would suggest a patronizing tone.)
Speaking for myself, in an ephemeral chit-chat situation like the wine one, responding in kind with small talk (that may not be a completely accurate reflection of your feelings on the matter) rather than an honest drawn-out treatment of the subject, would be my general instinct, yes. Neither do I go around answering the question “how are you doing?” with an honest status report of my well-being. Depending on my mood, my answer might range anywhere from “Yeah, I like them from time to time” (not really true) to “Well, they’re a little sweet for my tastes, but I love red zinfandels” (honest answer.)
I very much dislike chatty cashiers, especially the ones like the OP refers to. I pride myself on being polite to everyone unless they’re rude to me first (and even then, I often shift into “painfully polite” mode which borders on sarcasm, but that’s not really relevant here). I don’t want the cashier to comment on my purchases. My purchases are none of the cashier’s business. I don’t care if I drop 20 boxes of Massengill on the counter (yeah, I once saw a lady in a supermarket with an armload of about that many–I’ve been curious for years)–ring 'em up, bag 'em up, and take my money. I’ll say “thank you” and smile, you’ll say “have a nice day,” and I’ll be on my way.
It’s not that I’m rude, hate people, or wish ill on supermarket cashiers. I don’t want to chitchat with anybody I don’t know in a public setting. I don’t like to chitchat. The only exceptions to this are people who comment on my World of Warcraft T-shirts and ask me what I play (these often lead to discussions of each other’s characters and raiding experience, which is fun if no one else is waiting for the clerk’s attention), or people who ask me about my pets because I love talking about my cats. If someone attempts to chitchat with me about mundane things, kids, my purchases, or something equally annoying, I’ll simply smile, make a noncommittal noise, and continue with what I’m doing. I’m actually fairly good at politely discouraging unwanted conversation.
BTW, every time I see a clerk or waitperson with an “Ask Me About <Whatever>” button on, I automatically assume they’ve heard every stupid joke in the book about it, and figure I could quite possibly the one who finally causes them to snap if I attempt another one. So I don’t. If I’m genuinely interested in the product in question, I ask politely about it.
It happens all the time at my work; something isn’t scanning properly, the price on the register is different from the price on the shelf (we always give the customer the lower of the two prices, obviously), or there’s no barcode on the item to scan.
It was also very common when I worked in supermarkets too. Not an unusual situation at all, basically.
I was at kohl’s a few months ago and they had to look up a blouse my mom wanted to buy on the kohl’s website in order to find the appropriate number to punch into the computer. I was like, what the fuck kohl’s?
No one cares if you don’t like chatty cashiers. They’re part and parcel of life, much like brussel sprouts. And no matter how many times you close your eyes and wish, they’re still going to be on your plate so you might as well eat them.
It’s been a damn long time since i was a cashier but i agree with the premise of the OP in that it was rude for the cashier to tell the whole fucking store what you bought.
If i had a dollar for every time i was asked if i got an employee discount, or for winning lottery numbers I’d have enough for a sizable down payment on a house. The people i hated most as a cashier were the ones who came through my line with a week’s worth of groceries asking me why i had to work on the Lord’s day. Fuck them with a rusty chainsaw dipped in pig shit.
If someone attempts to chitchat with me about mundane things, kids, my purchases, or something equally annoying, I’ll simply smile, make a noncommittal noise, and continue with what I’m doing. I’m actually fairly good at politely discouraging unwanted conversation.