k, i can't stand it, or, so I was looking at my penis..



ahuh ahuh ahuh ahuh a huh a

huh huhuhuhuhmmmmmmmmm


whew I need a drink of water. get rid of this cottonmouth.
whew again
WARNING INOR BOILERPLATE here, to say in the most friendly manner, if you are one of those who is offended by profanity, lewd sexual references or concepts, or any manner of adolescence, please scoot your cute l’il butts on out, go here to give Lsura and carina some encouragement in their very worthwhile endeavor, or here to do the same for soda or here same-same for farmer.
I present this warning because I never seem to know what will happen when I get this way. Could go anywhere- I think this’ll stay pretty tame, but I can’t guarantee it…

Thank you


As I was saying, I was looking at my penis and talking to it. Since I split the sheets with my last SO, quite some time ago, it hasn’t gotten up to much, if you take my meaning.
Oh, there’ve been short relationships, one night stands, but sport fucking was never really my thing.
Now, from my experience in the good relationships, I assume it’ll get better when the time is right, but it is still very difficult to deal with.
At first, I lambasted my (are we far enough down yet so the nice people can’t see? Nope? Oh well.) COCK with a vengeance, as you might imagine. Letting me, um, down, like that. I called it names, (you little prick, you dickhead, grow up you little not-fucker, etc…), slapped it around a little sometimes, and generally made it’s life hell.
But then…
I realized that’s not how you treat someone- you catch more flies with honey than vinegar.
So, a week and several large jugs of honey (and many, many showers) later, I began talking to my COCK in a kinder, gentler manner. And that’s what I do now. And it’s working.
And I’m glad. I remember times, well, with my first wife- that’s been so long ago, it seems like it doesn’t count. More recently, but still plenty long times ago, my second major relationship.


We knew several of our neighbors, and one time she got kind of vocal. Afterwards, I put on some jeans, went out on the front stoop to have a cigarette, and several of the neighbors were standing across the street. Some with their mouths open. After a minute of looking at them, and them looking at me, I went back inside.
Or another time- we had rented a porn flick and decided to do everything we saw them do, keep up with the goings-on in the movie.
After a little while, I was near stroking out- they’re very male fantasy, which means I was doing all the work, she was mostly jsut enjoying herself. So I reached a point where I jsut collapsed. She had been riding high, and was just about to the point of incoherency when this happened and she snapped back to the world in a kind of beautiful frenzy and said rapid-fire, ‘[sub]what[/sub]whatWHAT!!’. I was reduced to a giggling mass of shaky jello. She was pretty good-natured and saw the humor a couple days later. I still smile about it.
Or, the time we had gone out to barbeque with some friends and stayed at their house, which was an old one, built not so well. It had a wooden foundation and you could set up harmonic vibrations. We didn’t know this, and didn’t pay attention until, and I swear this is true, some knick knack or other had slid till it fell off it’s shelf, and hit me on my back. Apparantly the same thing happened to several other items around the house. We stayed friends with them for a while longer, but they never invited us out for the night again.

So, I have to have faith that it’s gonna get better.

If some of you sensitive ones didn’t heed my boilerplate up there, please comfort yourselves with the knowledge that i have left out the time we ruined an entire half of her couch from the vaginal secretions, or did the same to a bench-style truck seat while driving at highway speeds, or what I taught her cat to do…
Just some mundane, pointless stuff I thought I’d mention.

Kind of a statement of hope, really.

Dude, seriously, lay off the cough medicine. We’re worried about you.
[sub]As for the “vocal” thing, when I first went back to college I dated a girl that woke up the guys on the third floor. My room was in the basement. I’ll tell you, faking or not, it was a grand thing. Nothing quite like those lulls, though. Buck up little camper, it’ll get better.[/sub]

…“post” :D, and all I can think to say, yup, lulls suck. Especialy when you’re lonely. And I can’t even reminisce 'cause every time I think of the good times with my ex, it is drowned out by the pain. And anger. GRRRRRRRR! Looking back unemotionaly, there were some inreresting moments. (I will not go off in anger now. I have the strength not to) Mebbe someday soon I can tell the adventures we had.

For some reason lately I’ve develpoed this thing for bathrooms… :wink:

Oh, and inor? You made me fall off my chair in mad fits of giggles! It took me, God, I don’t know HOW long to recover! I think I may have blacked out from laughter!

[sub]inor, I think I am inadvertantly stalking you. Either that or you’re everywhere. Or both. ;)[/sub]

What in the name of all that is sexy did you teach her CAT?!?!?!

I’d like to send my sympathy to inor’s neighbors. If, that is, you’re doing all that out loud. If not, why the hell not?

Sexual frustration…it’s kind of like acne. Sure you can live with it, it’s not painful, but it itches like a bitch.

Because I’ve already been involuntarily commited twice and have a healthy fear of the mostest juniorest cops showing up at my door…they treat you worse than a criminal if this is why they’re comin ta get ya- I think it’s on the theory that a crazy person is more potentially dangerous than a criminal person…so for this reason, I’m tryina break my neighbors in slllooooow…

That’s what I thought at the time, and that’s what I think and I like you…

inadvertant or vertant- I think at least one party has to be an unwilling participant in order for it to be considered stalking…
glad, in this instance you fell off your chair- 'at’s whutum here fo…
I laughed back on your own comment, (you have made me laugh many times and I have been remiss in not letting you know about it- I’m gonna try harder) and lastly,

can you say catilingus?
[sub]how the woman laid still for it I’ll never know…I mean, they got rough tongues…

I recommend wrapping an ace bandage around your head at the crucial moment. It’s always done wonders for me.

Either the first or second time, did we meet on the floor during group crafts time?

Someone please make the required “pussy” joke, I’m to icked out to do it…




<sigh><smile>aw, fuck. Can I use that ‘too icked out’ thing?
I think you went ahead with the obligatory pussy joke, and did a right fpiffy job of it too…

Yeah, after I hit Submit Reply I thought “well, might as well put Licked out!” Sheesh!