Yeah, I was just taking a wild guess as to why He’d explain things to them in that way, but your theory is awesome. So, I’m agreeable to going with that.
My favorite verse in the Bible is the last one in John: “Jesus did many other things as well. Were they all to be written down, I suppose the world itself could not contain the books that would be written.” That would definitely fill in a lot of cracks, that’s for sure.
Says the Catholic to the Biblical literalist who just killed someone for working on the Sabbath.
Nah, Ezekiel 23:20.
Was it *The Lamb Lies Down On Broadway *album?
And what’s even more ludicrous: the person who claims that those who run on electricity or compressed air or gerbils aren’t cars.
Okay. That was good.
Which version are you using?
Apparently his own.
It’s about 20 pages long.
It’s a serious question, though. The Bible comes in a variety of versions, some missing entire books that are found in others. If it is Flyer’s position that only someone who believes in the literal truth of the Bible is a Christian, it is important he identify, specifically, which version of the Bible has to be literally taken.
For one, again, different versions have different sets of texts. Catholic bibles have books no Protestant version does, and Protestant bibles are not entirely consistent with one another.
Secondly, unless he’s much more educated than he’s letting on, Flyer is reading an English translation of the Bible, not the original text. Different translations are, to put it mildly, of varying levels of quality; they absolutely do NOT say the same things, and different verses will often have strikingly different literal meanings. So Flyer has to identify precisely what Bible is absolutely correct, since anyone following a different version or translation is wrong and not a Christian.
Would it be possible to identify the version from the verses he quotes in his post #23?
Using biblehub.com, all his verses seem to come from the KJV.
About halfway through this I started imagining it ended up like the Stonehenge scene in Spinal tap. With God standing over a tiny Ark and Noah having to admit he has no idea what the fuck a cubit actually is.
Actually yeah. Flyer uses this for 2 Timothy 3:16:
“All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness.”
This is clearly one or another of the King James versions; it’s hard to say which, as the newly updated versions (the original is a pretty hard read at times; English in Jacobean times was a hell of a lot different) don’t change this particular passage. It is however quite different in other versions.
(grabs smelling salts)
Yep, it’s in there. 
p.s. Last year, one of my friends posted a picture on Facebook of an ark her 9-year-old daughter had made in Sunday school. It has a plastic spoon taped to it, and no, it was not a rudder or a sail.
It was Noah’s wi-fi antenna.
On the subject of biblical literalism, I seem to recall from a documentary that there are approximately 6000 bibles or books or fragments of books from the era before printing presses that are known to exist. Of them, not one is an exact copy of any of the other ones. Each is unique.
So, the question of which one is the inerrant “word” is not a light one.
I wish I had been involved in that project. It would make fascinating (if a little tedious) work.
Love it.
The next time the Pope is answering questions, someone should ask him flat out: Which parts of the Bible are bullshit, and which parts are true? It’ll be nice to get an official, definitive ruling on that. A Catholic one, anyway. (And a followup: What’s up with fish? That’s meat, right?)
Been there, done that. Not long ago, either.