Last whipping I ever got from Dad...

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

I posted this on a Green Bay Packer thread which was titled “Last Time You Were Spanked By Your Mom Or Dad” (((Off Season, it is a little slow))))… It won… And, it is 98.2% true…

I was riding from Illinois to Arizona at the ripe/wacky age of 13 in the back of my Mom and Dads Pontiac Boat… After about 18 hours of hearing my mom clear her throat every 2.3 miles and dad smoking I had about blew up!!! So, I devised a clever trick while my mom was asleep… I slipped down into the foot wells in the back seat area hidden from view completely from Mom & Dad by that Sofa they called the front seat… I pulled the door handle behind my mom, and with my right foot kicked the back door open and at the same time screamed

AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!

384 ft down the road, at the end of the 312 ft black mark my dad laid while locking up the Pontiac while sliding off the road I was getting my ass spanked for the last time ever by my dad…

As my mother almost died of a heart attack from my scream she turned around to see the door closing, and no “Only Son” setting in the back… When she finally realized that I was in the back was from another scream from me as my dad had lost complete control of the car and it was sliding sideways toward the side of the road…

Dad had no real concern at all for me at that very moment, he only knew that he was leaving 49% of the tread from those Bias ply tires he had bought just before the trip at Rural King on that slide towards the ditch in eastern Texas…

After the whipping, I realized my mother had hurt her neck turning it around .000276 seconds after the scream because it had “Kinked” leaning on the cold window asleep for about 61 miles…

I was the perfect child the rest of the trip… My mom looked like she was crippled for about 6 days and had a pillow on her neck… My dad would call complete strangers over to tell them what his “Idiot Son” had done… The tires “Thumped” from the flat spot burned into them during the 384ft slide the rest of the trip…

No, I never did it again… :dubious:

2

I think my dad would’ve left me on the side of that road. After he beat the snot outta me, of course. :eek:

3

Did someone have a measuring tape?

4

Welcome to the SDMB! :slight_smile:

I thought your story was very funny. :smiley: You have an evil, twisted sense of humor. I like that in a person.

5

Let’s see. The last time I remember dad giving the belt to me was when I did something nearly as equally stupid. I was in the van with my family and were taking another roadtrip (but we were on the way home). The van was custom, one of those behemoth, 4 captain’s chairs and a bench in the back.

Well my sister and I were at the “prank” stage of our relationship. I stuck a pencil (point outwards) behind her in the cushion and she noticed it of course, told dad when he came back from the gas station and dad went ballistic. I was always closer to my mom, and my sister was closer to my dad.

I got home and it was the last time I remember him using the belt on me.

6

Thanks Davebear!!!

My dad gave few spankings, but that one I sure deserved…

But, you know, it SEEMED, like it would be funny, and we would all laugh about it and at the next city we passed my Dad would have bought me icecream for being so inventive… That, uuummm, was at least what my 13 year old mine thought…