Laundry and Social Protest

During my summer volunteer work for Habitat for Humanity I frequently visited the “lower class” areas of Harrisburg and noticed that the people there were almost all black, as if they were still being forced to live separately from us. Now I realize the true reason for this barrier: Laundry sorting

Think about it. All these years I’ve been taught to “separate the whites and the darks” but never realized that this was only the voice of reactionary segregationists who are trying to re-indoctrinate the idea of “separate but equal” and Jim Crow. The truth is that even in the laundry the loads are not equal. The whites, for example, can be washed in hot water, with bleach, whereas the darker colors (a.k.a. African Americans) don’t get anything but normal detergent and warm water.

The argument that the colors and whites will become “mixed” and the darker colors will bleed onto the whites clearly reeks of eugenics, the practice of “breeding” to keep races “pure.” I have never had this problem as long as I’ve ever done laundry, even if I do throw it all into one (overloaded) cycle. Therefore I must conclude that this is a lie spread by the ultra-right-wing (e.g. Trent Lott).

Therefore as a form of social protest I have decided to never again sort my laundry by color. This policy is a symbol of racism at it’s epitome, and I shall have no part in it.

Yeah, and did you ever notice how you can buy brown eggs, or you can buy white eggs, but they never seem to be mixed together in the same carton?


Listen, Dex, if you wanna walk around in dingy grey ‘white’ clothes, be my guest. Me, I’m gonna use bleach. Call me cracker if you will.