Mine’s nothing, compared to Jerrybear’s, but I hate closure. Newspapers report the astonishing fact that a funeral was held for someone, and, just so you know, it will provide closure. What a tacky way to express a deep concept. It takes a long time to work through grief. The way they toss about “closure”, you’d think people could open and shut like zippers.
“I DON"T KNOW”… it drives me crazy I think people say it as a filler. It’s like ummmm … instead of ummm they say I don’t know…but yet continue to tell you the answer…or what they think. Ask just the simple question of, “What are you going to do tonight?” … you will be surprised how many will start their answer with… “I don’t know…we are going to a movie”… Or in the middle of a sentence…they will pause and say “I don’t know” and then continue on…grrrrrr
I nominate “near miss” when describing a situation where planes nearly collide. It isn’t a near miss, they DID miss! It was a near hit!
Two that drive me batty, and unfortunately, I think I’m the only one:
The utter mis- and over-use of the word “tragedy.” I realize nowadays the word has more connotations than what Aristotle originally intended, but it’s just getting silly. Saw a newscaster this morning define the death of the Bijani twins as a “tragedy.” Now, the negative index of the word “pathetic” would make that a bad choice as well, but tragedy?
More than two people dead? All right, anchors. It’s tragic.
And, on a completely unrelated note: I hate whenever something happens to, in, or about Canada, editors across the country think it’s witty and original to headline the article “Oh! Canada!” or “Oh, Canada.” or “Oh no! Canada!” After Vancouver won the Olympics, the Seattle Times (might have been the P-I) had “O Vancouver!” as the banner headline.
It’s not original anymore. Hasn’t been since the first newspaper ran a story about our new official national anthem in 1980. And it was never all that witty, either.
Aguecheek, for that matter, there’s “[blank]less in Seattle.”
FISH
j.c. - back to corporate-speak, I’m afraid that no one in a position of influence ever used “smart” in my presence. In retrospect, I probably should have seen that as a sign that I was on the list headed “disposable.”
At a “town meeting” earlier this year, the CEO of my former company got up and spoke of how it was tantamount that we achieve Objective X by the end of the year.
True to form, the two executive toadies who are vying to become CEO Heir Apparent both parroted the phrase when their turns to speak came – “as Dennis has said, it is absolutely tantamount that we reach Objective X…,” “it is utterly tantamount for us to achieve…,” and so forth.
I wonder if a new meme was born here and we’ll be hearing “tantamount” misused in boardrooms from coast to coast by year’s end. Well, I won’t be hearing it directly, but perhaps someone will write a column.