Let Me Tell You About My Laundry Room (Possible) Faux Pas

In My Humble Opinion
1

I’ve been mulling over this laundry room incident since it happened on Saturday … and then I thought to myself that Dopers love to parse out a good laundry room etiquette situation, so I decided to share and see what you all think about this.

Our apartment building has a laundry room, with 4 washers and 4 dryers.

On Saturday morning, I had 1 load of laundry to do, so I headed on down to the laundry room. Another woman was in the room, apparently she had very recently arrived because she was standing with a big laundry bag and was loading her wash into a washer. It was obvious to me that she had quite a lot of laundry, more than one load.

I thought (this is important later) that she said “I’m going to use all three.” and so I said something like “That’s OK, because I only have one load to wash.” and then I popped it in the fourth washer, fired it up, and left.

I returned at the appropriate time to move my clothes from the washer to the dryer, the other woman was not there.

Later, Mr. Del went to the laundry room to get the clothes out of the dryer. He was laughing when he came back to the apartment. “What did you do to that woman in the laundry room?” he asked me. She was back in the laundry room and talking on her cell phone. She told whoever she was talking to that it was taking her longer to do her laundry than she planned, because even though she explained to another woman (me) that she was “going to use all these washing machines” this rude woman pushed past her anyway.

Oops. I really didn’t understand that she was saying all these, I thought she had said three. I do feel badly that she thinks I intentionally ignored her in some weird passive-aggressive laundry power play.

But then I thought it is pretty nervy to call dibs on 100% of the machines in the first place. This is the part I’m going back and forth on. If I had arrived five minutes later, all four machines would have been in use and I would have had to wait. However, if she had arrived five minutes later, my one machine would have been washing and she still would have needed to wait another cycle for her fourth load. She was in the room first, but had only gotten started on one machine.

She is not a neighbor I know, I don’t think I’ve seen her before so she might be new. There aren’t any posted rules about using the laundry facilities, everyone tends to be very easy-going. If/when I see her again, I will explain that I misunderstood her, but I’m not sure I’m going to apologize for the actual using of the washer. I mean, I might but I’ve not decided yet.

So, reactions, thoughts, opinions? Am I sorry for only misunderstanding her and then causing her to think I rudely ignored her, or am I also sorry for taking the washer she had tried to claim?

2

FWIW - I’d consider it rude to hog all the machines. It’s not your fault she can’t be bothered to do her laundry in a more timely manner rather than letting it pile up.

I might acknowledge the misunderstanding, but I wouldn’t apologize for it.

3

I agree with SylverOne. It’s just plain inconsiderate to take up all the available machines at once. If you want unlimited access to a washer, get a place where you can have one and buy your own.

4

Make that three. If you let your laundry pile up that you have to use all the machines, that’s just poor planning.

Tell her you misunderstood, and let it go.

5

The only thing is, “all three” doesn’t make any sense when there are four.

6

First one to get their gonch in the machine wins. No tackling, though

7

Yeah, and if you’re listening with about half an ear, which I probably would be in the same situation, I’m not picking up on the all, just what I think is the number of washers she plans on using, in which the three/these is understandable.

I’d especially lean towards the misheard ‘three’ because I’d find it more that a little outrageous that someone would even consider occupying all 4 machines. Tying up more than 2 of the machines is ill-mannered.

8

Let’s say you heard it right and she said “I’m going to use all these machines”. I think your response and actions would have been comically appropriate.

If the first person in the room had actually had all 4 machines filled already with quarters plugged, etc, then I wouldn’t think too much of it. But since it’s obvious that it was just a plan and that that person was going to take all four regardless of others’ needs, I don’t give too much sympathy. If you see the person again, apologize for mishearing them, but I wouldn’t apologize for taking the machine.

I have a friend who lives in a condo building with 5 units sharing a laundry room of 2 washers and 2 dryers. They set up a schedule for what days each unit can use the laundry room which has gone really well for them as there’s no fighting, waiting or worst of them all, having strangers handling your just cleaned delicates

9

That woman was rude as hell!! If you have that much laundry, you go to one of those big places and do it there. I would be laughing away if I were you, and knowing you will now have a new neighbor that will give you the stink-eye. Screw her, I like getting one neighbor I don’t like and get to stink-eye at, personally.

10

I used to live in a building with a dozen or more of each washer and dryer, and even in the middle of the day on a Tuesday (not a very busy day!) it was unheard of to take more than two washers at once even if you had more than two loads to do!

Explain that you misunderstood, but also make it clear that using all 4 machines is rude of her, and that people in civilized society are expected to share. You did nothing wrong.

11

I’m gonna go with pretty nervy. Besides, what if someone else had already started a load or two? She can’t count on getting all four washers and dryers for herself, especially not on a Saturday. She’s in a group situation, she’s going to have to assume that other people will want to use those appliances too.

12

Well, I think it’s a faux pas to use more than three washers at once (I can understand wanting to do a load of whites, a load of colors, and a load of reds, and having that many full loads if she’s washing for a family) but not that big a faux pas. Apologize briefly to the woman for having misunderstood. If she accepts graciously, leave it at that. But if she makes a big stink about it to your face, don’t hesitate to defend yourself.

13

You’re in the clear in my book. If you honestly didn’t hear her correctly, then you didn’t hear her correctly. Oh well, but it’s a perfectly valid excuse in my book.
I’d give a “Whoops, sorry about that. I thought you said…” then give a shrug/smile/whatever, and then just leave it be.
You’re done with the matter after you’ve explained it.

14

That was my initial reaction to the OP, but after thinking about it, I can’t really justify that opinion. Suppose you (the generic ‘you’) go to this laundry room and three of the machines are already taken. It’s prefectly fine to take the last one. Anyone who comes in later will just have to wait. So if it’s okay to use the last machine, why would it be wrong for one person to use all of them? I just don’t see a case where someone who is ready and able to use a washing machine has an obligation to leave it available on the chance that someone else will want it.

Now, as to whether you can vocally claim a machine, that’s a bit murkier. If nothing else, I think the next time this woman goes to the room with four loads of laundry, she’ll quickly throw something in each machine, and then take her time getting them all sorted, loaded, and running.

15

Screw her, I don’t think its inappropriate to claim 1 machine, but when there are 4 machines and 2 people there is no way she can try to claim the lot.

16

Thanks for all the responses, it is good to know that I’m not hopelessly rude!

Sorry for the long quote, but it really gets to the philosophical issue I am looking at. This is where I’ve landed:

  1. It’s too bad I misunderstood her. Liberal, I agree that saying “all three” is unusual, but that didn’t even register at the time – the "three’ was what jumped out at me. Obviously I didn’t think about it too much, but if pressed for an explanation at the time, I would have thought she was concerned that I was doing two loads (thus cutting in to one of her “three”).

  2. I think it is even somewhat okay if she had used all four machines if the laundry room was completely empty. It would be weird to expect someone to sit around looking at empty washing machines on the chance that someone else wants to use it. However, my expectations on this point might change a bit depending on the timing – midday on a Tuesday is low traffic, but Saturday morning is a high traffic time in our building. It’s annoying, but I don’t think it’s technically wrong.

  3. Having another person right there in the room before she had even touched the machine is different, so I’m not going to apologize for the actual taking of the washer. It was a vacant washer and I needed to do laundry so I used it.

Using a laundry room is an interesting sociological experience, that’s for sure. It also amazes me how poorly some people treat their clothes.

17

Using all of the machines at once is inappropriate, barring a special situation (i.e. you’ve had a flood or fire, a wave of barfing through your household, a need to quickly eradicate a lice infestation) because it’s disproportionate. It’s taking more than your fair share. There are four machines for the use of multiple people, not the use of one person who failed to adequately budget their time and let their laundry pile up. It’s not neighborly behavior, it’s selfishly putting your desire to do all of your laundry in one go no matter what inconvenience that poses to the other residents of the building.

18

If there were 8 of each machine (washers and driers), this kind of person would just wait until she’d soiled enough linen to hog them all. It’s the same pattern of behaviour and I think there’s no need to apologise. She needs to learn how shared resources work.

19

If I were you, the next time I run into her I’d just say “Hey sorry, I heard you wrong, probably because it never occurred to me that anyone would feel entitled to take ALL FOUR machines at once.”

I’m a long-time apartment dweller, and honestly I’d never take more than two machines at once even if it were 10:00a on Wednesday. Because the thing is, someone else might need them, and they’re not mine.

20

It’s doubly rude that she’s doing this on Saturday morning, which IME is one of the busiest times of the week. Besides, don’t people have any shame? If I had that much laundry I’d sneak in on a Tuesday or at like 9:30 at night and do it. (Our laundry rooms used to lock at 11 PM).