Letter to the Editor

Mundane Pointless Stuff I Must Share (MPSIMS)
#1

I wrote a rather scathing email to the editor of a local paper, expressing some of my thoughts about the general stupidity of the people in this city.

Here’s a few excerpts :

Just when I thought this city couldn’t get any dumber, they’ve done it again! Voters of this city seem to welcome with open arms to office anyone who has been indicted, so leave it to these brilliant minds to decide that
marijuana is not okay, but alcohol and tobacco are
<snip>
I really think the heat down
here is frying peoples’ brains (unlike pot, which does not kill brain cells. Alcohol does.)

Lafayette citizens are hardly angels. In fact, it seems like the local
past-time of choice is drunken driving.

Until moving to Lafayette, I’d never really seen TRUE stupidity. It only gets worse too, because the smart ones move away to greener pastures, preferable pastures where the infant mortality rate, poverty rate, etc, isn’t among the highest in the nation.

I think I’m going to keep my pot smoking on the down-low from now on…

–anonymous (for fear that a drunken redneck will knock down my door and beat me senseless with an Abita beer bottle)
>
hmm excerpts… well actually that’s almost all of the letter. Oh well. (Abita is a local beer, BTW) And Lafayette is Louisiana. Anyway, when I wrote the email, I was semi-delerious from sleep deprivation and really just blowing off a little bit of steam.

Much to my surprise, the editor emailed me back the next day saying she’d love to print my letter, BUT I could not be anonymous. She would have to print my full name in the paper
and have my full address for her records.

My initial reaction was ABSOFRIGGINLUTELY NOT! These damn rednecks down here will have me for lunch (with a side of alligator).

But then I got to thinking. Child molesters, the most dispicable human beings in the world have to put their pictures, names, and addresses right there in the paper for all to see and you never hear about any of them getting tracked down and clobbered.

So what do you guys think? Should I go ahead and flame 130,000 people simultaneously or should I just keep my big mouth shut? (Actually I’m a very quiet person until you put a pen in my hand)

–puff

#2

Go ahead. Drunken rednecks probably couldn’t figure out what your address is.

I had a letter published in The Washington Post calling Senator Jesse Helms a drug dealer. I got one phone call after it was published, from a woman thanking me for having the guts to say it.

#3

Do you have to provide I.D.? make up your flame name!

Be a man, use an alias.

All this science, I don’t understand. It’s just my job 5 days a week-- Rocketman

#4

If your opinion isn’t important enough to own it publicly, it isn’t very important at all, is it?

“I love God! He’s so deliciously evil!” - Stewie Griffin, Family Guy

#5

Publish it. Do you really think drunken rednecks read the op-ed page of the paper.

#6

No way. I’d never do that. Too many crazy mutha truckas out there.

Do it at your own risk, dude.

Men are from Mars, women are from Venus, dogs are from Pluto. - Anonymous

#7

Go ahead and show your name, although don’t be surprised when people start calling you asking if they can bum a nickle bag off you.

“My guitar is my first wife. It doesn’t scream at me. It screams for me.” SRV

#8

Besides the fact that you say that you smoke marijuana.

Do you want your employer or family to know that?

#9

BTW, you should also post your email address and the city you live in that you have in your profile. :slight_smile:

#10

10,000 fork when all you need is a knife…
Rain on your wedding day…
A free ride when you’re already there…

Isn’t it ironic that this dude comes from Tokerville, La.

Don’t bogart that joint, I’m laughing my ass off!!!

Ahh… Puffington… Puffweed@hotmail.com… never mind.

I get it.

#11

Go for it. And keep records of any and all harrassment you might get (from your letter, methinks that the local authorities would be more concerned than th local rednecks) - who knows? Maybe you can go on to sue the paper for forcing you to use your name from the sunsequent harrassment?

On an unrelated note, I know of Abita beer. Turbo Dog rules!

Yer pal,
Satan

#12

I say go for it too. But, when giving your name, make it the name of your worst enemy :slight_smile:

Or just tell the editor that you fear retribution and you’d rather have the name
“John S - Dingleville” instead of the entire enchilada

#13

You need a pseudonym. I use one whenever I send a letter to the editor.

#14

If ‘‘The Advertiser’’ is like most urban newspapers, the opinion page editor will only publish a letter if she can verify the name of the person who submitted it. A pseudonym probably won’t work.

Forget about the idea of filing a lawsuit against the paper if people harass you because of what you wrote. You’d be wasting your time, because the newspaper isn’t legally responsible for how other people respond to your words. They didn’t force you to submit the letter for publication. You have the option of declining to have it published.

I think you should tell the editor thanks, but no thanks. If you publicly identify yourself as a pot smoker, it’s an open invitation for the police to take a closer look. Why risk it, unless you want to be a martyr for the cause?

#15

My family is 1500 miles away and my employer is an alcoholic and apparently happy to have me on board. They went through 11 people in a year trying to fill my job. I could pretty much burn the damn place to the ground and not get fired.

hehe yeah, hadn’t thought of that

And that right there is the reason I’ve decided not to do it. The cops down here are awful. A friend of mine had his house searched without a warrant (or consent). They handcuffed him to a water pipe and pawed through the house for 4 hours before they finally found about $20 worth of weed and a pipe and threw him in jail.

I’ve committed a few colossal blunders in my day and I have a feeling giving these people my name would be another. Plus I guess the letter really would accomplish nothing - it’s not like the people are gonna realize they’re stupid and suddenly get smart.

#16

This would be a great sig line, especially if you start it with, ‘‘Why do I bother?’’ :wink:

#17

ChiefScott: 10,000 fork when all you need is a knife…

The line in 10,000 spoons, IIRC

Rain on your wedding day…

“Rain on your wedding day” depends on where you live. Only if the places was an absolute desert with no rainfall would rain on my wedding day be unexpected. But ironic?

A free ride when you’re already there…

Then quit hitchhiking.

Isn’t it ironic that this dude comes from Tokerville, La.

No, not really. Rather apropos, actually.

#18

It’s “a free ride when you’ve already paid.”

#19

Maybe if all the pot smokers in the country would own up to their opinions in public forums, the pro-legalization forces might have something to show to their Senators and Congresscritters. You think? As it is, as long as they can point to the apparently marginal support for legalization among the average Joes and Bettys, they have no reason to make legalization a part of their election platform.

“I love God! He’s so deliciously evil!” - Stewie Griffin, Family Guy