Letter to the old bitch down the road

The BBQ Pit
1

Dear sweet little old lady,

I know that in your little world there are only two options available for women. It baffles me that you manage to be current in the news and politics, but unaware that women have more choices than a and b only. It saddens me that you don’t rejoice that my generation has such a wealth of opportunity and a surfeit of choices. You seem much happier trying to force everyone into your two options, and almost sputtering with rage when they don’t fit or more often, just ignore your ramblings.

Tell me, dearie, just why you think I’m irresponsible, selfish and unwomanly. Let’s see. Oh that’s right, because I don’t fit into your world view. I’m not a SAHM or a high-powered career woman, therefore I’m a useless failure. hehehe, it would’ve almost been funny, if not for the venom with which you spewed at me.

I get part of your problem with me, after all, I have had others insult me for my reproductive choices before today. But what I don’t understand is your insistence that if I refuse to be a SAHM, I must be a career-woman. The fact the you can only envisage two options for women astounds me and when I try to point out all the other things I can do and be, you talk over me and say that the only possible thing that could fulfill me would be to have children, and since I selfishly won’t do that, the least I could do is be a slave for a company and free another woman to do her duty. Sheesh !

But don’t stop there. You then denigrate every career-focused woman in history, calling them ‘unwomanly’ and ‘man-like’. So it’s obvious to me that even should I give up my chosen path in life (which does not include a high-powered career OR children) and be a business-woman, I would still be wrong in your eyes.

OK. I have a handle on this. A woman’s place is at home with the children, in your not very fucking humble opinion. Nope, I’m wrong again. You then launch into a diatribe about all the lazy SAHM’s and how they don’t have to do any work these days, not like all the hard work you did. They’ve got it easy, and they don’t do the job properly. And the ones that work outside the home, placing their children in childcare are worst of all, are they ? Selfishly doing what they want and abandoning their children ?

So I can choose children or a career, only. If I choose both, I’m evil, and either one I select, you’ll find a way to find fault with me, because I’ve heard your bitching for long enough.

So please forgive me if I completely ignore you as soon as you start rambling next time we meet. It’s obvious you’ll disapprove no matter what I do or say. In fact it’s clear that there isn’t a single damn thing in the world that gives you happiness, unless it’s bitching to other people.

I feel sorry for you. I hope you find happiness or at least stop trying to spread misery. I hope you find it soon, because I’m very quickly running out of patience and charitableness where you’re concerned.

Regards,
The unwomanly, selfish bitch down the road.

I’m posting this here, because I won’t let it out at her IRL, and this will hopefully give me enough release to put up with her a bit longer.

2

Well, Goo, that woman is a silly, narrow-minded, blinkered old cow.

Okay, I know a few in her generation who remember how it was x-years way back – but none of th’ one’s I know, who I consider revered friends, go into such a pointless, judgemental coil as this one.

Sorry you have this in your life, I really am.

3

Bless you for letting it out here instead of to her face. It sounds like she’s got enough bitterness and misery to last her what few unhappy years she has left as it is.

4

As Gloria has said, “When was the last time you heard a man asked how he handled both a family and career?”

You didn’t say how old the woman is. I do cut a certain amount of slack for those who may be “slowing down” mentally.

5

Wow. What unfortunate combination of circumstances require your presence with this woman?

I think you made the right decision. It doesn’t sound as though she likes anyone, and isn’t likely to change her ways through either calm, rational discourse or a verbal head-to-toe reaming. I’m not sure what other option there is besides just nodding, letting it bounce off you, and resolving not to turn into her when you get older.

Don’t let her get to you, Goo. We love you just the way you are.

6

Am I correct in thinking that SAHM= Stay At Home Mom?

Now, back to the kitchen! Make me a sammich and bring me a beer!

OW! OW!! Stop it!

[sup]Hmmm… should I press “submit”? What if Astrogirl sees this? There could be consequences… Ah, what the hell…[/sup]

7

Why not just say, “And how is that any of your damn business?”

8

Just FYI, surfeit means overindulgence, or too much of something to the point of discomfort.

So to say that women face a surfeit of choices and then to berate a woman for embracing fewer choices is pretty damn ironic.

9

I think the best response to this nasty old piece of work would be “Well, that’s your opinion” and say no more. And get away from her quickly; people like this are soul-killers. They spread bad feelings like a plague.
(Oh, just for the record, every woman has my total support to be and do exactly what she feels like doing and being, as long as it isn’t illegal or hurting anyone else.)

10

I am helping a friendly neighbour whose father is very ill (radiotherapy for a brain tumour) by doing a bit of running around for her, and just spending time with him, to give her a break.

Unfortunately, this old bat comes over sporadically, not to help, but to share misery. At the moment, helping my neighbour is more important to me than removing myself from her presence, but as soon as I’m not needed, I hope never to come across this bitter old witch again.

Thanks for just letting me just vent. Much better than me going nuclear over the old lady, which will change nothing and help noone.

(Oh, and racekarl, thanks. I thought surfeit just meant an overwhelmingly huge abundance or amount. I didn’t realise it had the negative connotation it does. So thanks for today’s learning moment :slight_smile: )

11

Let me guess she is the person who sits near her window all day watching what the neighbours are doing then pestering them with complaints about their behaviour. Petitions the council to impose draconian road rules, complains to the schools about noisy children walking home past her house, and wonders why people don’t spend more time with her?

Good on you Goo for not venting at her, she sounds miserable enough as it is.

12

What Guinastasia said.

Goo, you rock (for a heartless, selfish, childless type :D). That old lady is sad and bitter. Don’t worry about her. We think you’re cool.

13

Hmmm, I had all that stuff pencilled in for my curmudgeonly old age. I was going to yell at the kids to get offa my yard, too.

14

featherlou I think the trick is to be a part time curmudgeon that way friends and family will still want to visit you.

Either that or be a very witty curmudgeon so that people are so entranced by your humour that don’t get really offended. :slight_smile:

15

Saaay, Goo, doesn’t this thread infringe on the copyright of one of your previous threads??

Er, nevermind.

16

So you live down the road from Dr. Laura, huh?
That sucks.

17

Excuse me ?