Life Imitates Sitcoms -- Dearborn police free handcuffed wife

I think I’ve seen this in a few dozen sitcoms. Good to know people in real life can be as stupid.

What surprised me is that the call came in at 7:15 in the morning. Assuming their nookie schedule is the same as most people, she was probably handcuffed between 10pm-1am.

That leaves 6+ hours of attempting hammers/hacksaws/etc., or else they just said “Fuck it honey, just sleep with you hands like that and we’ll call for help in the morning.”*

Or maybe he finished, got sleepy, and went down to sleep on the couch to avoid her bitching. :stuck_out_tongue:

When I ran a SF convention, we had three in one weekend.

Or maybe this, y’know, worked, and they were at it all night…

You have no idea. Just a piece of advice. When you are indulging in a rape fantasy game with your spouse, don’t call 911 and hang up as part of the game. Even a hangup goes through and the cops have to investigate.

In a more, um, innocent vein, when my sister and her friend were teenagers, they found a pair of handcuffs our brother had(As I recall he’d used them years ago to pester my sister and me) Still they were bored, so friend decided it’d be funny to put one cuff on her wrist and the other on my sister’s. Ha! Except, like I said, my brother had long ago lost the keys. So they earned a trip down to the police station. The cops had a grand time, insisting on fingerprinting them before they’d help them out.

I had a couple pairs of handcuffs a long time ago and a couple girls I knew found them and did that exact thing, put one on each girls wrist…I hadnt had keys for those in a couple years.
I let them run around wondering what they were going to do for an hour before I picked the lock. (note these were cheap not real cuffs)

I was handcuffed to a cute girl I happened to be standing near at a spring break once… We walked around for 6 hours like that because we were both very drunk and thought it was hilarious.

Ofc, we could have gotten out of it at any time, as they were cheapo toy handcuffs(but still metal) with the unlocking tab, but hey, it was funny. Made out with her for a while, but sadly nothing beyond that. :frowning:

(and somehow, the next day, I woke up, very hung over, in a room with 7 girls in it. None of them new who I was, nor do I remember how I ended up there. And somehow, I ended up carrying their luggage downstairs for them… >_<)

That’s hot.


I didn’t realize there were universal handcuff keys. One would think those would be hot sellers on the black market.

Black market? A quick googling shows that you can order one over the net for as little as $3.50 - and as a bonus, it’s a nightstick-shaped key chain.

He said sit coms…not sci fi fantasty :slight_smile: