It’s finally happened. I’m working in Dilbert’s organization.
We now have an: **Office of Workforce Effectiveness and Resources. **
:smack:
Does the boss have pointy hair?
What exactly does this newly created office handle?
Well, they are in charge of … umm… well, nobody really knows… but they report their findings directly to the section chief. Who, coincidentally, is balding.
My team and I have developed a really nifty reporting tool for them. They chose red because it’s the fastest. As soon as they enter some data, we’ll all see how it’s working out.
That explains the slow black and white reporting tools I’ve been churning out.
Is it the font or the background?
A few years ago, the office I used to work in underwent a reorganization. There was a “Vertical” Team and a “Horizontal” Team. It was one of the silliest things I’d ever heard of. We did this after months of meetings with the boss. We told the boss it wasn’t going to work, but he did it anyway. Boy, were we right.
This same boss once told me to do “an analysis of my analysis”. I kid you not. I posted a rant about this in the Pit when it happened. Dilbert happened to be this guy’s favorite comic, by the way. I swear he was taking pointers from the Pointy Haired Boss.
I’m so glad I don’t work there anymore.
There’s a survey at my work asking what we should call some new human resources group. The name that’s winning is something like: Coordinated Human Resources Integration System - CHRIS. Is that adorable or what??
I can retire in under 4 years. I can take it. I can take it…
I think you should suggest “Coordinated Resource Activation Program.”
I was at a staff meeting once where an HR flack actually said “40% of sickdays fall on a Monday or Friday.” No irony, no knowing looks around the room. He was actually upset at this number, and wanted us to do better.
I was gobsmacked.
I left that job soon after.
I’m surprised you didn’t speak up. Would have been pretty funny.
Anyway, to the OP, just be glad your name isn’t Michael Bolton.
It’s the colour of the database we designed. 
That is pretty good seeing is how those are the most desirable days for people to take “sick” days. It looks like the company should have been proud to have a perfectly honest workforce and they were too stupid to be proud of that.
I have a little cork board outside of my office where I post comics and interesting news items. I don’t put Dilbert strips there because they usually hit too close to home, and I’m afraid of offending someone from management.
Anyone who works in engineering will tell you that Dilbert isn’t a comic, it’s a documentary.
I know this wasnt a “stupid boss” OP, but I can’t help myself.
This reminds me of my wife’s former boss explaining to everyone that even house numbers are always on the right side of the street, and odd numbers are always on the left. My wife thought she was kidding, and asked her what happened when she drove the other direction. My wife said you could tell from her boss’s deer-in-the-headlights look that she never really considered the question before.
My wife had another boss (boy, she’s had some winners) complaining that half of all children in the US were of below-average intelligence. She let that one slide.
I assume weekend work wasn’t required of anyone?
At our regular Monday morning staff meetings, one of the fixed topics is who’s gonna be out of the office or otherwise unavailable during the coming week. We got to that point during a recent meeting, and the guy who takes the meeting notes asked, “Is anyone planning any unexpected time out this week?” To which I replied, “Yes, I’m unexpecting to be here all day Thursday. Schedule that.” Perhaps relevant, is that I’ve been described as “abrasive” in at least two performance reviews. But then, to me, that’s a good thing. There are times when I fully intend to be abrasive; I’m glad my efforts haven’t gone unnoticed - only unrewarded.
This is actually possible. Let’s look at this example:
[ul]
[li] Child A’s IQ = 150[/li][li] Child A’s IQ = 140[/li][li] Child A’s IQ = 110[/li][li] Child A’s IQ = 100[/li][li] Child A’s IQ = 100[/li][/ul]
In this example, three of the the five kids have an IQ less than the average of 120. If you swap median, however, for average in your initial claim, then, yeah, it’s an absurd statement.
You’re exactly right, UncleBeer. Thanks for the catch.
Just for general purposes, I’ll still say he was an idiot, though.
But, more likely than not, the speaker wasn’t knowledgable in statistics, and uses average to mean median.
Agreed. The speaker was probably an idiot. Perhaps a case can be made for the speaker even containing twice the idiocy.
Well hang about, surely “average” can mean the mean or the median, can’t it?