Ok, I’ll bet that no other doper has as many car problems as I currently have. My situation is a bit atypical as I actually have 3 different–albeit decrepit–vehicles that I drive regularly (one of them owned by my place of employment).
I think I’ll be pretty hard to beat. (And please note that all three cars are currently operational.) Anyway, here’s my list of complaints:
passenger side power window doesn’t work
shock absorbers are on their last legs
brake pads are very thin
trunk can’t be opened because handle broke off
front two turn lights are missing
left rear turn light is burned out;
passenger side exterior door handle broke off
lots of hail damage on body
some rust on fenders
rusted gas tank (causes frequent clogging of fuel filter)
radio doesn’t work
a/c doesn’t work;
passenger side power window doesn’t work (different car, same problem)
no license plate
the bell dings every time I open the driver side door and continues whenever I’m driving less than 15 mph and sometimes even when the car is parked with no keys in it and all doors closed
interior lights have been removed because of dinging problem so battery won’t run down when parked;
I know, I know, it’s time to buy a new one.
You cannot lock any of the doors, if you’d like to open them again.
The brakes are screwed in every way.
It burns oil.
It still has the paper state-to-state transfer plates it had when I received it- last year.
Needs a new muffler. d_redguy’s car:
Passenger window does not go up OR down. And it is stuck 2 inches in the down direction.
It leaks oil.
If it rains or is humid, it won’t start until it dries out again.
The stereo speakers are broken. All music comes through a bass box purchased at Wal-mart.
It currently has a flat tire.
Plates, tags and inspection are long expired.
Drivers side window pulley is destroyed.
Drivers side window seal is leaking.
ABS light refuses to come off.
Power Steering fluid leak.
Completely blown shocks. Completely.
Both front CV Boots blown.
Both front axles need replaced.
Possible warped front rotors, causing wobble when brakes are applied.
Windshield Washer fluid resevior won’t hold fluid.
Several small oil leaks.
One large oil leak that drips onto exhaust manifold, causing smoke and, until recently, catch on fire.
Badly balding drivers side rear tire.
AC and Heater smell like burning oil. All the time.
Antenna is missing.
Vaccuum Leak (we think) that causes the car to stutter, then surge during idle. Occasionally, esp. when making turns or coming to a stop, the car dies. Cause unknown.
Numerous places where paint is beginning to peel.
Paint from a red truck imbedded in hood where my girl drove the front of the car under the back of the truck. No real damage, but ugly as sin.
Small holes in leather interior near passenger side rear window.
Numerous stains in carpet, sources both known and unknown.
That’s pretty funny - I came in to tell you about the fact that my fog lights burn out within 24 hours of putting new bulbs in and that I have a dead bug stuck in my instrument panel. I thought I had problems.
And, no, I do not waste money on fog lights any more.
Fuel gauge doesn’t work
Back left door sometimes sticks when it rains
Passenger side window sometimes falls down
Leaking water or something - will need expensive repairs worth more than the car
Flattish baldish tyres
Thin brake pads
Is ugly
The Cherokee needs a tune-up and routine maintenance on the front differential.
The CJ2A runs like new (not bad for a 57-year-old car), but the fan does hit the fan shroud if I hit a bump. I should get that straightened out.
The MGB doesn’t really count, as it is undergoing a total restoration; which is to say literally everything is wrong with it! Cracked head on the engine, no upholstery, no seats, no paint, no batteries, needs body work, I need to find an overdrive transmission (believe me, the non-overdrive isn’t good enough for today’s driving), no top, rubber seals are hard and brittle… everything needs to be fixed.
The problem I have is space. I have one carport. I have the kayak in the front, then the CJ2A, and I park the Yamaha behind the Jeep. The Cherokee parks on the street. When the MGB is finished I’ll have to park the Jeep on the street so I can put the B into the carport. Or I’ll have to sell the Willys. Or find someone who has some extra space on their property (in L.A.!).
ABS light occasionally turns on
SRS light turned on a couple days ago and won’t go away
Windshield cracked
sticky power door locks
flaky cruise control switch
leaks oil
leaks transmission fluid
back tires getting worn
headlights fogged
horn won’t work
shop says inner tie rod ends are loose
sometimes idles too low (and rough)
inspection sticker expired
I don’t drive the car that often - at least not until I can afford to have the safety related issues fixed.
I actually have a pretty problem-free car right now, knock wood. It needs to have the radiator looked at, and there’s a dead moth stuck in one of the vents, but that’s it, since I already got the brake calipers replaced.
My last two cars, though, I drove for months or years without ever addressing their problems.
The Cavalier:
big hole peeled back in the sheet metal of the driver’s side door
bad exhaust system
digital dashboard and instrument panel had melted fuses, so the oil temp, oil pressure and fuel gauges didn’t work, and the speedometer was five mph off
upholstery of back seat had constant mildew smell
moon roof leaked
I loved that car.
I can’t even remember what was wrong with the Reliant except that I hated it.
gmarkstephens–one of mine is an Acura Integra, '89 edition, but only 125,000 miles on it. It sat for 4 years without being used. Now can you guess which one has a badly corroded gas tank? I still love it. Yours is a '92? I figure your driver side door handle will break off any day now; the passenger side is probably good for a couple more years.
Tristan–I’m willing to concede that you may have me beat. But I remembered a few other problems since posting this morning. Add these to my OP:
gas gauge is totally dead
gas gauge is fairly reliable until I get to 1/4 tank
‘service engine’ light stays on permanently
window gasket by driver is bad so there’s lots of road noise and it drips on driver when it’s raining
windshield wiper motor is starting to fail–doesn’t always stop when or where is should
slow leak on one tire
the thing that secures the spare tire underneath is broken so I have to store it in the trunk (this is the car with the trunk door that doesn’t open)
I’ll probably think of more as soon as I submit this. And this sharing is giving me a (little) sense of catharsis. Is it helping anyone else?
The Maxima:
None of the windows roll down
The muffler is a rusty chewed up mess
Brakes squealing for mercy
no radio at all
the gauges do really weird things
small leaks all over the place
some thudding under the car deal when I turn left
bad tires
no heat
doors won’t lock
water leaks into the trunk somehow
emergency brake gets hung horribly so it’s never used
big long dent and scrape on the driver side…
170k+ miles
fails emissions even though all the plugs and wires were changed, it was tuned up, oil was changed
Therefore:
Bad tags (switched from the Corsica)
Corsica:
Busted windshield
needs headgasket…could be worse, I cant afford to even get it checked out at this point
But none of this compares to the Grand Am I just sold:
No battery
Bad alternator
engine covered with squirrel poo
Swiss cheese radiator
no heat (bypassed heater core a while back)
shot transmission
shot clutch
washer fluid reservoir busted by yours truly…oops
right turn signal wouldn’t work
right headlight wouldn’t work
high beams wouldnt work
paint peeling all over
trunk tied down with jumprope
very very bad tires
steering column, front seat, and dash and back seat torn up when someone tried their darnedest to steal the car even though it had no battery at the time
had a nice stereo until the speakers were ripped out
My 1996 Impala SS currently:
Has a leaky rear main seal
Two rear windows that won’t roll down (popular Imp problem)
Dim odometer (another popular Imp problem)
Two bald rear tires (I hear this is a popular Imp problem too ;))
Just got done putting in a new radiator (thanks GM for the $26000 car with a plastic radiator) and fixing a very nasty air induction leak.
-Some engine sensor malfunctioned, leaving the yellow engine light on
-Makes a klikity-klikity noise when I make right turns (bad CV joint?)
-Makes a different but equally annoying klick-kclik noise when braking. Also goes ‘squeek-squeek’.
-Some paneling on the driver’s side rattles when driving on highway.
So, when braking while making right turns, the damn car sounds like I’m shaking a metal box full of marbles and bolts. Which is kind of a shame, because beyond all these nuances it is a fun little car, 3 years old with 46k miles on it.
[ul]
[li]Gas cap lid doesn’t close from the outside by itself. I have to hold down the lever inside the car while someone else pushes in on the lid.[/li][li]Dome light doesn’t work. Probably just a burned-out bulb but I’ve never bothered to replace it.[/li][li]Instrument panel light occasionally doesn’t go on, so I have to tap the dimmer control to get the light to work again.[/li][li]Minor imperfections on the paint (but that’s to be expected after awhile.)[/li][li]Right channel on stereo cuts out after about 10 minutes.[/li][li]Brakes squeal.[/li][/ul]
1988 Toyota Corolla (my last car, 121,000 miles at trade-in):
[ul]
[li]Gas mileage steadily dropping (was down to 16 mpg by the time I traded it in)[/li][li]Air conditioner stopped working[/li][li]Engine overheated after driving short distances[/li][li]Horn was broken[/li][li]Mismatched window handle on passenger door[/li][li]Mismatched vent director used to replace the one that had broken off[/li][li]Windshield wiper blades needed to be replaced, and one of them was always coming loose.[/li][li]Big crack along the bottom of the windshield[/li][li]Rear window defroster didn’t work[/li][li]Upholstery stitching coming apart in driver’s seat.[/li][li]Cigarette lighter didn’t work (but I don’t smoke anyway.)[/li][li]A big, long list of other problems the mechanic found when I took it in to have the gas mileage problem checked out. The estimate was $2300 for all repairs, so this was when I decided to trade it off.[/li][/ul]
