Why all the emphasis on evolutionary biology?
All that stuff is so remote!
Isn’t it much more important to focus on the inestimable damage done by the total exclusion of Hollow Earth Theory from geography courses?
I bought real estate, and a sinister cabal of sex mutilators and cattle educators have conspired to prevent me from moving house.
The schools oughta teach the truth about creation, which is that the earth was created by a giant named P’an Ku out of a Cosmic Egg, and took some 18,000 years.
Sadly, I know a strict creationist who got a 33 on his ACT.
But I’m an “evolutionist,” and I got a 34.
Yeah, but I was 12 and didn’t have a clue about geometry or trigonometry on the quantitative. Got a 19 in the math. IN YO FACE, BIYATCH!
Kimstu
January 25, 2004, 6:39pm
24
Frey linked the teaching of evolution to increasing teenage sexual activity
How’s he going to account for the fact that teenage sexual activity currently seems to be decreasing ?
Studies show that a smaller proportion of youth between the ages of 15 and 17 are sexually active. Between 1991 and 1997, teenagers reporting having sexual intercourse dropped 5.7 percent, and the teen pregnancy rate was down 14 percent.
So it’s not just you, Ilsa . Everybody’s not doin’ it.
Oh, yeah. Now that’s what I’m talkin’ about!
Oh, and Flannery O’Connor came up with the best guy name ever in her story Good Country People : Manley Pointer.
Anna Belle
Baker
January 25, 2004, 7:54pm
26
Of course you may have seen this already, but after the hoo-rah here in Kansas a while back over the teaching of evolution, I couldn’t resist posting thisMemo from God to the Kansas Board of Education.
I am SO turned on right now.
The first event was the creation of Atum, the god of Heliopolis. There is dispute over whether he created himself, or was the son of Nu. Some texts say he first appeared over the hill, others say he was, himself, the hill. Eventually, Atum became associated with Ra, the sun-god. Ra-Atum at this point is said to be the coming of the light to disperse the darkness of Nu. Ra-Atum is symbolized by the Phoenix in this context. His next task was to create other gods. He did this by masturbation, not having a mate. This was not offensive to ancient Egyptians, but in fact intensified his power in their minds.
Creation is the result of the sacrifice of Purusha (Man), the primeval being, who is all that exists, including “whatever has been and whatever is to be.” When Purusha, who had “a thousand heads, a thousand eyes, a thousand feet” was sacrificed, the clarified butter that resulted was made into the beasts which inhabit the earth. This same sacrifice produced the gods, Indra (the menacing king of gods), Agni (Fire), Vayu (Wind), as well as the Sun and the Moon. From Purusha’s navel the atmosphere was born; his head produced the heaven; his feet produced the earth; his ear the sky. The four varnas were born too: the mouth was the brahman (priest); the arms the kshatriya (warrior); the thigh the vaishya (general populace); the feet the shudra (servant).
The mother of the Aztec creation story was called “Coatlique”, the Lady of the Skirt of Snakes. She was created in the image of the unknown, decorated with skulls, snakes, and lacerated hands. There are no cracks in her body and she is a perfect monolith (a totality of intensity and self-containment, yet her features were sqaure and decapitated).
Coatlique was first impregnated by an obsidian knife and gave birth to Coyolxanuhqui, goddess of the moon, and to a group of male offspring, who became the stars. Then one day Coatlique found a ball of feathers, which she tucked into her bosom. Whe she looked for it later, it was gone, at which time she realized that she was again pregnant. Her children, the moon and stars did not believe her story. Ashamed of their mother, they resolved to kill her. A goddess could only give birth once, to the original litter of divinity and no more. During the time that they were plotting her demise, Coatlicue gave birth to the fiery god of war, Huitzilopochtli. With the help of a fire serpent, he destroyed his brothers and sister, murdering them in a rage. He beheaded Coyolxauhqui and threw her body into a deep gorge in a mountain, where it lies dismembered forever.
Bottom line: If you really want “equal time” in your science class, it’d take four or more years just to get through all of the possible creation stories.
That would be incredibly amusing. Then they’d be having a shitfit cause their kids were being taught pagan/heathen things.
