Loiterer at my store. Every day.

[tr0psn4j]

You run a specialty shop. These type of regulars are to be expected.

She’s buying stuff and talking to customers. How can that be a bad thing? As long as customers aren’t complaining, you should put up with it.

You might want to set some boundaries though. She shouldn’t open cages or go behind the counter.

She’s “marinating.” At least, that’s the term we made up for the people who did this at a fishing tackle shop I worked at for a few months. Sometimes they can be annoying to deal with but other times, when you’re busy, they’ll help out customers.

I’m a bit shocked that the majority of this thread doesn’t agree with me!

[MsWhatsit]

@tr0psn4j

She’s buying stuff and talking to customers. How can that be a bad thing? As long as customers aren’t complaining, you should put up with it.

Speaking as a customer, I wouldn’t complain. I just wouldn’t come back.

[kenobi_65]

@tr0psn4j

As long as customers aren’t complaining, you should put up with it.

Complaints are by no means a good way to determine if she’s negatively impacting the business. If customers are avoiding shopping at that store due to her, most of them probably will not complain to the owner – they simply will stop shopping there. Most people don’t like confrontation or conflict, and just not showing up any more is probably a far more likely response for most people who are put off by her.

[tr0psn4j]

@kenobi_65

Complaints are by no means a good way to determine if she’s negatively impacting the business. If customers are avoiding shopping at that store due to her, most of them probably will not complain to the owner – they simply will stop shopping there. Most people don’t like confrontation or conflict, and just not showing up any more is probably a far more likely response for most people who are put off by her.

I could see that being the case.

I still maintain having some regulars might be beneficial.
These regulars I was speaking, by the way, are older and either retired or own their own business. This gives them the time to hang out at a store. While they aren’t there daily, they are there a couple of days a week.

[kayaker]

@Rhythmdvl

Hire her to make deliveries.

. . .and then send her to deliver something overseas.

I am a small business owner. Bottom line, if a customer is more of a pain in the ass than the revenue they generate for you is worth, ask them to shop elsewhere. I’ve done this a few times over the years. If they come onto your property after you ask them not to, call the police.

[MysteryFellow63427]

@kayaker

. . .and then send her to deliver something overseas.

I am a small business owner. Bottom line, if a customer is more of a pain in the ass than the revenue they generate for you is worth, ask them to shop elsewhere. I’ve done this a few times over the years. If they come onto your property after you ask them not to, call the police.

@LSLGuy

This woman has taken over your store. A customer behind the counter is totally out of line. She considers herself a *de facto *employee or at least volunteer, even if she isn’t cleaning fishtanks. You need to run her off promptly & firmly.

It’s clear from all the info upthread that she’s socially clueless. So all manner of “hints”, from brief closings to denying her bathroom privileges to posting “no loitering” signs will fail completely to deliver a “message”. She’ll never recognize those hints.

What *does *deliver a message is clear plain English & unequivocal behavior from you and your staff.

When she next comes in, do this immediately: “Please leave our store & never come back. We do not want you loitering in our store & we do not want you as a customer. Good day.” Then escort her to the door. Call the cops if she doesn’t depart. Call the cops immediately when she next returns. Which she will.

If you don’t want a scene with other coustomers present, just wait until whichever day she next shows up when nobody else is in the store. Certainly that’ll happen in the next week or so & if she’s been haunting your store for months then another couple days won’t change the situation.

You will have a difficult & mildly unpleasant time getting rid of her. But she is running off your customers now. And will continue doing so UFN. Until you stop her.

Resist the urge to soften the blow by telling her she might try volunteering at the local bird rescue society or whatever. You want her to stop seeing you as her best / only friend in the world and to start seeing you as somebody she doesn’t want to be around. Given her 4th grade social skills that’s what’ll work to change her behavior. You being the nice helpful charitable person you usually are just won’t work.

Although it will be difficult for you as a self-acknowledged wimp, I think this is what you need to do. Stiffen up, practice it in a mirror, then KICK HER OUT, NEVER TO RETURN. It’s for the good of your business. And do call the police if she returns.

Dealing with this will be unpleasant, but think of it as a personal growth opportunity. Plus, it will also be good for your pocketbook.

[Randy_Seltzer]

I see a different problem from the other people responding. Your failure to create appropriate boundaries might create problematic legal liability under the doctrine of apparent agency. You allow her to do things that might lead another customer to believe she is an employee, and this could make you liable for any damages she caused.

For example, say she sees another customer admiring an animal. She comes over and chats with him, and eventually offers to let him hold the animal. She opens the cage hands it to him. It bites him and he is terribly injured somehow. Now if he had just pulled the animal out himself, his case against you wouldn’t be very strong; he assumed the risk. And if it had been obvious the person offering the animal had no authority to do so, it would be similar. But if you allowed him to believe this person worked for you, now he’s got a cause of action against you. There are all kinds of things she could do that could lead to liability – leaving a cage door open, letting someone else use the restroom, giving bad pet advice, or even simply getting into a fight and punching somebody.

My advice? If you don’t want to go so far as to kick her out of your store forever, you need to set some clear boundaries. Just take her aside one day and say, “I just had a talk with my [imaginary] lawyer last night and he said I need to start enforcing certain store policies. So you can’t use the staff restroom any more, you can’t come behind the counter any more, and you can’t open cages any more. I’m sorry, this is for legal reasons.” It won’t totally solve the problem of the loitering – though I can’t imagine her staying that long if she can’t use your bathroom – but it would head off legal problems. And if she violates any of your new rules, then kicking her out forever will be a lot less awkward.

[YogSothoth]

Start trying to sell things to her all the time so that whenever she wants to talk, you’re selling her stuff. Either she’ll get sick of it and leave or you’ll get more money

[Lynn_Bodoni]

@Alias

I’ve considered the NO LOITERING sign, especially after the third or fourth time she stood and the counter and calmly watched me eat lunch, but my co-owner thought it seemed needlessly aggressive towards other customers. Also, I really think she would assume it didn’t apply to her. She already goes in the back room to use our restroom without permission, comes behind the counter, and opens cages without asking.

Seriously, if I put up a sign for every single thing customers did that annoyed me, I wouldn’t need paint on the walls.

She is no longer a valuable customer, but a liability.

Next time she comes in, tell her that she needs to stop using your restroom, that she can’t go behind the counter any more, and can’t open the cages without asking any more. If you need to give an explanation, tell her that it’s for legal reasons (and there probably ARE legal reasons). But she can’t act like this. And tell her that you need some space to eat your lunch. This is based on you allowing her to continue to shop at your store. You might still like her.

But give her one notice and three warnings. After the third warning, tell her that she is no longer welcome at your store.

[Randy_Seltzer]

@Lynn_Bodoni

[…]
If you need to give an explanation, tell her that it’s for legal reasons (and there probably ARE legal reasons).
[…]

Probably.

[fluiddruid]

I’m not in favor of telling her to go away forever – the problem is nobody’s told her that her behavior was slowly sliding into problem areas, then becoming completely inappropriate. It makes it hard to tell the person off, so I’d recommend just starting with a clear boundary line and going from there. I know some people who are COMPLETELY oblivious to signals, or even social norms – she sounds like that. Tell her clearly, directly, without anger and you might turn her into a good customer (of course, you might not).

Take her aside and say “Hey, I need you to stay out of the cages, the backroom, and the counter areas. I’m sorry I haven’t addressed this with you before, but those areas are for employees only.” No stares, no half measures – direct her not to do that. Do not debate this, it is not for her to review the reasons. Just say “Sorry, you can’t do that anymore. Please don’t.”

To add to this, if she’s still loitering after losing her ‘special regular’ status (that I’m sure she thinks she has), it’s time for another chat. “I appreciate your business, but the length of your stays in the store are becoming disruptive to me being able to run my business. I’d appreciate it if you cut back your visits a bit. If you need help with a purchase, let me know, but I’m afraid I can’t spend as much time on personal chats. Sorry.” No sighs, no signals – be clear and forthright. Then follow through.

You want to emphasize that she is a CUSTOMER, not a friend-of-owner, not a sorta-employee, not a volunteer, not anything special. You are staff, she is a customer, that is your relationship. If she keeps starting up chats with you, give her no special time privileges. A couple of minutes then find something else to do. If she follows, say, “I’m sorry, it’s nice to talk to you but I need to take care of some things. Do you need help with something first?” Keep her straight on in customer, not buddy, zone from now on.

Any guff, whining, being difficult, or she does it again anyway? Then it’s time for a “please don’t come back”. That sucks, but it’s in her court – she can choose to do as you’ve reasonably asked, or she can leave.

[Tom_Tildrum]

Whenever she comes in, just open the hissing cockroach’s tank. She’ll get the hint.

[PotLuck]

@fluiddruid

I’m not in favor of telling her to go away forever – the problem is nobody’s told her that her behavior was slowly sliding into problem areas, then becoming completely inappropriate. It makes it hard to tell the person off, so I’d recommend just starting with a clear boundary line and going from there. I know some people who are COMPLETELY oblivious to signals, or even social norms – she sounds like that. Tell her clearly, directly, without anger and you might turn her into a good customer (of course, you might not).

Take her aside and say “Hey, I need you to stay out of the cages, the backroom, and the counter areas. I’m sorry I haven’t addressed this with you before, but those areas are for employees only.” No stares, no half measures – direct her not to do that. Do not debate this, it is not for her to review the reasons. Just say “Sorry, you can’t do that anymore. Please don’t.”

Your entire post was dead-on but these paragraphs are the most salient points. Setting boundaries for the clueless sucks but it’s called for here.

[salinqmind]

Gosh. I’m sorry you are going through this, I have had ‘customers’ myself where I used to work. (It’s kind of funny in that if this were a movie or a novel, and maybe the sexes changed, it would be the start of a wacky and/or moving story. But real life isn’t like that!)

[LSLGuy]

**fluiddruid **has the best analysis & advice yet.

My advice jumped directly to step 2, banishment, assuming the loiterer would be too clueless to moderate her behavior if/when the OP clearly demanded it. That assumption *may *be unwarranted. OP? Any better info?

[Sigmagirl]

Are there any other stores similar to yours in your area? Can you check with their owners to see if she’s already been eighty-sixed out of them? She sounds like a woman I know who sits at the public library all day and tries to talk to people. She’s not homeless, just lonely. She’s been told to stop bothering people. I wonder if your shop is the latest on the list of places she’s found to hang out.

[Alias]

@Sigmagirl

Are there any other stores similar to yours in your area? Can you check with their owners to see if she’s already been eighty-sixed out of them? She sounds like a woman I know who sits at the public library all day and tries to talk to people. She’s not homeless, just lonely. She’s been told to stop bothering people. I wonder if your shop is the latest on the list of places she’s found to hang out.

I’ve actually considered this. The only other pet store in the area is a chain store, so I’m not sure how personal she can get with the staff there though. I think I’ll call them and see if they know who she is.

[Gyrate]

Introduce her to this messageboard. Then she’ll stay at home on her computer spending all her time bothering us instead.

[Kansas_Beekeeper]

I hate going into stores where there are a bunch of regulars sitting around chatting with the owner. I feel like I’m intruding.

Do not let her do volunteer work. She could be deemed to be an employee, and you could wind up owing back wages (plus penalties) and liable for workers’ compensation insurance for her.

Get her out now.

[lavenderviolet]

@LSLGuy

When she next comes in, do this immediately: “Please leave our store & never come back. We do not want you loitering in our store & we do not want you as a customer. Good day.” Then escort her to the door. Call the cops if she doesn’t depart. Call the cops immediately when she next returns. Which she will.

I think this approach could backfire. I think it will just confuse her and probably cause her to obsess over what happened that suddenly she got kicked out when everything had (from her perspective) been going fine before. Plus she probably has become dependent on the pet store as a social outlet, and I think it’s cruel to suddenly cut off what might be her only social outlet without any warning.

Instead, I think that I would start off with telling her some reasonable boundaries (like no longer using the employee restroom) and if she can’t abide by that then it would be justified to ask her to stop coming there at all. At least then it won’t come as a total shock.