Get yourself a cheap cactus, put it next to your monitor. Then when she isn’t looking, turn the brightness control all the way down so the screen is dark. Tell her the damn cactus screwed up your monitor and it’s all her fault.
We actually have about 7 pods in our cube farm that have onions sitting plates in them, as a result of that email!
Dunno why the gummint is trying so hard to get everyone vaccinated when all that was needed was for everyone to carry an onion in his pocket.
+17
Better yet mess with her monitor controls while she’s out. Tint, contrast, brightness, etc. Then when she asks “What the heck is wrong with my monitor?” you can tell her it must be the cactus.
In my day, we wore onions on our belt, as was the style at the time.
Well, you don’t expect African violets to do the job, do you?
Seriously, think before you speak.
Everybody knows African violets refract the radiation–they don’t absorb it.
But cacti? Maybe this is a pricklier problem than I first thought. I think I’ll go have a nice succulent lunch and ponder it. Saguaro gonna put the cacti, anyway?
Even if it was to work, my office has sufficient pricks around without addition of cacti…
No, the violets tend to shrink.
When I clicked the link I was almost certain it would be these.
What? They’ll help promote thinking too. 
Me, too.
Maybe she’ll notice the phallicy.
You really don’t want those catci to absorb **too **much radiation. That would make the tarantula eggs mutate. There’ nothing worse than having your cactus explode and having the resulting giant mutant tarantulas overtaking your office!
*Snap!
It’s like a black hole in a bags of holding!
I think you mean a Portable Hole in a Bag of Holding.