Phew! I suspected as much, but you never know!
There’s a 
“That’s a Moray” joke to be made here, but I’m not up to the task…
When the fish is aligned and your butt’s greased up fine, that’s a Moray.
When you do number 2 and it squirms up in you, that’s a Moray
So is Vietnam man the Asian equivalent of Florida man?
Morays not only have teeth, they have two sets of jaws, each complete with teeth. The outer jaws grab the prey, then the inner “pharyngeal” jaws launch forward from their normal position in the throat, latch onto the prey and pull it farther in. The design of the creature’s mouth in the Alien movies was based on moray eels. If you must shove an eel up your ass, don’t use a moray.
Bravo! (x2)
I can see your point. But honestly if I am ever in a situation where I have considered and exhausted all possible alternatives and have conceded that the circumstances are indeed so desperate that I must shove an eel up my ass, I am probably going to use whatever eel is most readily available.
“It was a million to one shot, doc! Million to one!”
It was an Indian national.
Award for unfortunate juxtaposition of a line from the eel article, and a promo for another story:
Good god.
There once was a man from Hanoi
Who fancied an eel to enjoy
Zesting the enema
He added a lemona
But his screaming could reach Illinois
The Aristocrats!
Pfft, Y’all making a big deal out of this I mean it’s not exactly an original idea as they’ve been doing something similar since the days of ancient Rome
I’ve been trying to figure the logistics. A person has to have wildlife handlers with no morals and strong stomachs involved to make this happen, right?
When you’re desp’rate to come
Stick an eel up your bum
That’s a moray
If you fill your hind end
With a wriggling friend
That’s a moray
“Never insert live animals through the rectum due to unforseeable consequences.” (from original article)
I would imagine the surgeon wishes some things could be unseen!
Some people really need to find a hobby.
~VOW
This was beautifully written, though I never expected to encounter those words put together quite like that …
(And kudos to all the song writers so far, each was hilarious!)
Yeah; every so often I see articles & stories about the weird things people stick up their butt for pleasure (a tool box is an example I recall). And in the case of men, weird things they stick themselves into as well. A painful way to discover just how far in the fan of a handheld vacuum is.
Did he plan ahead for eelective surgery?
Dan
Eels up inside ya!
