Dang, swampbear, if this is the treatment for a smashed finger, I can’t help but wonder what you’d have offered when I had my gallbladder removed… the mind reels!
zig, you cracked me up! rub dirt on it!! 
did ya know there is a new flavour from b and j, karamel sutra?!?! here ya go! just wrap the hurting finger around the nice cold pint.
FairyChatMom, just for you I brought with me a couple of specially trained Mensan Cabana Boys. In addition to making intelligent conversation and finding smart women sexy, they have also been trained to bring the hot or cold drink of your choice on demand and to wash hair. They are also required to specialize in massaging one body part, although all the ones I’ve known are also excellent on backs. Yes, I brought the hand specialist, and he knows to be careful. He also has a wonderful voice – silk, and velvet, with a touch of brandy for warmth. Enjoy! 
CJ
Yes they’re real – why do you think I joined Mensa anyway!
rocking chair, that sounds decadent, and very threaputic. I shall investigate further at the grocery store.
cjhoworth, I’m speechless, and drooling… I do declare I just may swoon.
Oh yeah, and an update. I just changed the bandage - the throbbing has subsided, the swelling has gone down, and it’s not nearly as hot as it had been. Plus it’s not purple - mostly my finger was pasty white, with a little blood around the nail. Hubby smeared on some polysporin and put on a new bandage. I expect I’ll survive the night. But the pampering may continue - I could relapse at any moment!!
Ahhh. That explains the scream I heard this morning[sup]1[/sup].
And all of the other stuff explains the really bad traffic down Roosevelt Blvd. - all those ice cream and margarita delivery trucks, and the bus load of fan waving cabana boys.
Since your pampering needs seem pretty well taken care of, I offer a sweetly purring kitty, to lull you to sleep.
[sup]1[/sup] Not FCM screaming, but a Master Chief - he went into another room so FCM wouldn’t hear him and get upset.