Marilyn, Marilyn, Marilyn, Life's a Butter Dream

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

It was Family Game Night at the DeDay ranch, and in the middle of it I thought “Life’s like a board game.” I figured I could slap out a quick essay on that and I’d be all set for Monday. Which goes to show you how mind-numbing Family Game Night can be. It was so stupid! Life’s not “like a board game”, Life is a board game. And a breakfast cereal. And a magazine. So equating Life with another board game is just silly. What? It goes on waaaaay too long and if there was one more person playing someone would cry? That makes no sense, even for me. So forget all that. Life is not like a board game. Not even like the Game of Life. Especially not Monopoly Junior: Dig’n Dinos. So there.

But I had a dream the other night, so I’ll tell you about that instead. It wasn’t a very interesting dream, but whatcha gonna do? I could make up a more interesting dream, but that would be lying. You wouldn’t like me to lie to you would you? No, I didn’t think so. Now, on with the real dream I had: I was driving along in a green Jeep (one of those cool Rubicons and “Bettie” was painted on the side of the hood in yellow) with a Specific Yet Unnamed Doper Lady by my side. Actually she was in the passenger seat. All buckled in for safety. I’m a safe driver even in my dreams. It wasn’t the Doper Lady you probably think it was, so I’m not going to say exactly which one it really was in the dream. If I did all too many Other Doper Ladies would be all “but why weren’t you dreaming about meeeeee?” and I don’t need that kind of grief. Just know, all you Other Doper Ladies, I did dream about you. Just not this time.

Anyway, I was driving my green Jeep with a Doper Lady along for the ride. We started in Pennsylvania because we stayed at Zappo’s house for a while. He’s real nice. Very gracious. Even not in a dream. But now we were on our way to Texas to meet Scout. Even though she doesn’t live in Texas. But we were going to Texas to meet Scout because she was staying with Bad News Baboon, who does live in Texas. In Real Life she lives in Texas, and in the dream too. What are the odds? We were driving along this straight, flat road. It was in Nebraska and Arizona at the same time. Corn and desert. Weird. You can do stuff like that in a dream, drive in two states at the same time. Out one window: corn, out the other window: cactuses. You can stand in up to four states at the same time in Real Life, but you can’t drive around and be in two states. Unless the two states are side by side and you’re driving down the line between the two. In my dream it was even more weird because neither Nebraska nor Arizona is (are? no, “is” because its one or the other not both at once and that’s singular so its “is”) (unless its not) between Pennsylvania and Texas.

Anyway, we had to stop for the night and I got a room. It was really nice. The Unnamed Doper Lady wanted her own room, which was fine with me because I’m all married and everything and if I took a room with a Lady Who is Not My Wife, that would be bad. Even in my dream I’m a fine upstanding ethical person. But I made the Specific Doper Lady pay me back for the extra room in trade. I made her get me drinks.

Then I woke up.

Hey look! Extra stuff so you think you’re really getting a bargain on your effort to open up this thread!

Soupo lost his first tooth Friday. He was yapping away about something, just being a pest, so I popped him one in the gob. Knocked that tooth right out of his head. (Not really. He was wiggling it for, like, three weeks and it finally gave in and fell out.) Oh man, it reminded me of my first lost tooth. Dad all likkered up and whang! a call from the Tooth Fairy that night. (Not really. All my teeth fell out on their own. Except two of my Wisdom Teeth that got pulled out by a trained Dentist Person.) It’s nice to pass on Family Traditions. Only alls I got was a dime and Soupo scored two bucks. (That part is real.) Lousy kid.

My Sibs are useless! The Battlestar Galactica mini-series starts tonight and so I called my brother to see if he was going to watch it. He is. But would he tape it for me? Noooooooo! “The VCR’s not hooked up to tape.” My ass. So I called my sister and asked if she could tape it for me. Well, she could. If she had cable. I didn’t want to watch the stupid show anyway. Lousy Sibs.

You know how they have special stamps for the Holidays? They should have special stamps to send out your bills. Like instead of Santa Claus or a jaunty snowman, the “bill stamps” should have a Grim Reaper or one of those cows from out West after the aliens get done dissecting them. That would be so cool. But they don’t make those. Lousy Post Office.
-Rue.

2

Wow. I got to stay with Bad News Baboon and got a visit from Zappo, Rue and an Unnamed Doper Lady?

Woo hoo!

In a startling coincidence, I had a dream on Saturday that involved a Doper and driving. Must be something in the air. (I originally typed “ear” instead of “air” but that wouldn’t make any sense now, would it?)

3

Whenever I’ve dreamed of Dopers, they were faceless, nameless people who I knew were Dopers, but that’s about it. That would be understandable if I’d never met any, but I’ve met several, and seen photos of many more, so you’re not all faceless at all.

And Rue is right about Zappo - he’s neato-torpedo! I’m certain Rue is neato-torpedo, too, but I haven’t met him yet. But if I did, I wouldn’t make him pay for my hotel room. It’s just not done!

4

Oh, thank the Gods, I thought something was terriblly wrong when I checked for the MMP and didn’t find it! Why so late getting it posted, Rue, still thinking about the “Specific Yet Unnamed Doper Lady”?

Some people would say that life is a bored game that we can never win, but I’m more optimistic than that.

Personally, I love the Post Office. I went through the line not once, but twice this morning (due to poor planning on my part–I assumed they wouldn’t have a padded envelope big enough for what I needed to send, but they did (hooray!), so after mailing what I brought in, I went back to my car, got the other thing and went back inside to mail it) and both times everything was handled with efficiency and good cheer. And my friend Janet will be blown away by the fact that she is getting a Christmas present from me anywhere near Christmas. I usually save up all Christmas and birthday presents and make her come to see me in order to get them. She has to come to me because I live in Oregon and she lives in Missouri and who wants to visit Missouri even if your best friend lives there?

I’ll give you a minute to catch your breath.

Better now? I’ll try to use more punctuation this time.

I have been to Four Corners where (fittingly enough considering the name) four states all meet. You can stand in two states at the same time, but you would need more than two legs to stand in all four at once–but you could use your hands and be in four places at once. On that some trip, we drove over the most boring highway in America–across Nevada (but I can’t remember the number designation). Yeah, you can say all you want about how boring corn and wheat is, but until you’ve driven for hours through high desert, I’m not going to believe that any type of vegetation is more boring than no vegetation (not even catii). When we finally got to Reno I stayed up until 4:00 am playing blackjack and came away a winner (plus I was flirted with all night and that’s aways an ego boost). I’d pay to be flirted with these days . . .

Hey, I’ll just convince myself I was Rue’s Unnamed Doper Lady and that will keep my ego healthy for a week.

I’m happy now.

5

They should make a stamp of the Four Corners area/ monumont/ thingamaplacey. You could put the stamp right in the middle of the envelope and put the address up where stamp usually goes. Kinda like mail gender reassignment.

6

[nitpick]
The final line is “Lie fudge Esther theme”.
[/nitpick]

Carry on.

7

Good to hear that the tooth finally fell out. I remember him wiggling it for me. He was quite proud; it’s hard to imagine how proud he’d be of it actually coming out.

Do you want me to tape your show for you? I’ll do it if you email me the name of the unnamed Doper chick. And I wouldn’t tell a sole. Really.

8

So who’s going to change her screen-name to “Unknown Doper Lady?”

9

Life is like a game, but unfortunately, it’s not a board game. It’s Lawn Darts, and I’m the freaking Dart this week. :rolleyes:

I think we should call Washington and have the gummint rearrange all the states so we have more cool state intersections. Maybe twist all the states in the midwest so they all come together like the slices in a pizza. That would be sweeeet.

10

Shibb - you may not tell a sole, but would you tell a heel? Or a carp, for that matter?

(You know, 'cause I didn’t know if we were talking fish or feet here. Hmm, both are stinky.)

11

I think Shibb would tell–just for the halibut!

Kallessa strikes again.*

*I could have done a whole, looooong post using multiple puns–fish are so easy–but, based on the reactions to my earlier masterpieces, I’ll save it for an appreciative audience.

12

…Think I had a wet dream, cruisin’ through the Gulf stream…

So could Kip Addotta, Kallessa.

13

I’m know this wasn’t the point of the thread (actually, I’m not really sure the point of the thread, but that’s ok, not all MPSIMS needs to make sense to me.) :slight_smile: But if Family Game Night is mind-numbing, perhaps you’re playing the wrong games. Might I ask which ones? And what ages need to be catered to? Perhaps I could make some less mind-numbing suggestions…

14

Perhaps he’s palying with the wrong family.

15

(I’d correct the above typo but htis si a uRe theard.)

16

Now I’m wondering what Scoutterama has in her ear. I’m hoping it’s a Lieutenant Uhura subspace transciever. Because then she’d have to wear the Lieutenant Uhura red miniskirt and boots combo. Just the thought of Scout in a Lieutenant Uhura miniskirt and boots combo makes me feel all warm inside. Some parts are warmer than others, of course.

I can neither confirm nor deny that Kalley is the Unnamed Lady Doper. Well, I could deny it, but that might hurt her feelings. So I ain’t saying nuthin’. Nuthin’ at all. Although if she was wearing the Lt.U.M-S&B.C… well now, that might change a few things…

Thanks for the offer of taping for me Shibb. Yer OK. But I don’t think I want to see it anyway. Starbuck is a girl now. (I think they moved his stamp.) Loren Greene isn’t in it. (For obvious reasons.) They probably won’t even have Boxxy and His Robot Daggett, since they had to form a band and now they’re off touring Japan or something. I just got the Stripes DVD and I’ll watch that instead. It’s better anyway…

Man slortar! Jarts kicked ass! Especially after they were illegal. It added a dimension of outlawry to the competition. But they were worse than a Red Rider BB gun as far as poking-your-eye-out-ness went. (Which is one of the reasons I’m not a fighter pilot. Stupid glass eye.)

I think we should all write our Congresspersons and get the state outlines all changed. They could call it the Slortar Plan and all the gradeschool children would wonder just who the heck “slortar” was. We’d get a cooler map and slortar would go down in history. Tell me that isn’t a stamp well used.

It’s barely concievable that you don’t show up to all the meetings gonzoron. For Famly Game Night we have to play with the DeDay Family (until I upgrade). That would be:
Me
The Little Woman
Soupo DeDay (sound it out): age 7
&
Katcha DeDay (that one too): age 3 1/2

We used to play Risk and that was fun because I could totally kick ass. But the boys didn’t have so much fun and someone said the whole point of Family Game Night was so the boys could have fun too. So we have to play baby games now. Like “Monopoly Junior: Dig’n Dinos”. Although Dominoes can be fun.
-Rue. (having a bigger presence in my own thread)

17

I’m guessing that someone was probably the Little Woman, wasn’t it???

-scout (these boots hurt my feet)

18

I won’t say how I know this, but I happen to know that it is very easy to cheat at Shoots and Ladders, Candyland and * Uncle Wiggley* (do they still make Uncle Wiggley? It may need a name change). This makes it much more fun for anyone over the age of, say 6, and anyone under 6 doesn’t catch on. It has the bonus of being a good life lesson for Soupo and giving him a skill to pass on to his younger brother. Cheating–all the best families do it!

Rue, you can tell me I’m not the Unnamed Doper Lady, but you can’t make me belive it!

gonzoron, the point of the MMP is that there is no point. Just magnificant, witty comments in no particular order. Welcome aboard!

19

Annd Tori Speling errers wherever posible, gonzorron. We dun’t do know spel-cheking here.

  • Shibb

Who will likely rue the day that he teased Kalesa about her spelling. He’ll likely never win at Shoots and Ladders, Candyland, Uncle Wiggley, Hi Ho Cherry-O, Trouble, Headache, Sorry, or Hungry Hungry Hippos ever again.

:wink:

20

For the record, “belive” was a typo, not a spelling error. I’ll own up to “magnificant” however–I can never keep “ent” and “ant” straight.

Although I do know the difference between an Ent and and an ant.