I have often heard that Mark Twain and Rudyard Kipling privately swapped off color stories about the prudish queen. Supposedly some of the writings came to light and caused a minor scandal. Is this true?
I know little about Kipling, other than “The Jungle Book” and his ‘white man’s burden’ pro-colonialism. But I do think Twain had a sort of underground reputation for “working blue” at speeches and other private gatherings.
http://www.ralphmag.org/onan.html
Is this authentic Twain, or a hoax? I’m surprised a respectable author could have had such a thing published in the Victorian era.
It’s style reminds me of this famous hoax speech. http://www.urbanlegends.com/books/legman/arkansas_pronunciation.html
that was attributed to Twain as well - but probably not his work.
With the Comstock laws of that time, how did Twain preserve his respectabilty and manage to toss off the occassional dirty story?
Interesting question. I’m no expert here, but you are mentioning two of my favorite authors. I believe it would be quite in character for either or both of them to have engaged in such banter. My internet connection is slow beyond bearing tonight, so no cites are forthcoming, but you could check out Kipling’s poem: “The Ladies” for a slight indication of how he could get bawdy at times. Twain’s :“Letters From The Earth”, an anti-god view, was considered quite radical when this work first came to light. I hope better informed people with a faster 'net connection have more to add to this thread.
I’ve read Letters From the Earth a number of times, and it is some of the funniest stuff on the planet. It was published in the 1940s, long after Twain’s death by his daughter. It is not so much anti God as a viscious satire on organized religion. And it isn’t really jokes, it’s more like humorous points of view. Satan is sent to observe Man, and writes a bunch of letters back to God on how his mission has become horribly misunderstood, etc. This is not a work for the religious fundamentalist, but everyone else will have a really good laugh.
AFAIK, that onanism speech is legit. It’s been in several scholarly sources.
Twain has a bawdy sense of humor. Another work 1601, shows that Mel Brooks did not originate the fart joke.
Don’t forget his poem about the Mammoth Cod, or was it Whopping Cod? I can never remember, and am too lazy to look right now.
Might wanna rephrase that …
Funniest thing I’ve ever written on this board, no way I’m going to change it now. 
Now this is temptation. Twain and Kipling together in an OP.
Ya see, there was this thread. It got deleted in the Great Tragedy of the Hard Winter of 2002. This thread was a beautiful, innocent little thread, an homage to Miss Jane Austen, lost, lost forever. Among other laudable features, it allowed me to post the opinions of Messrs. Twain and Kipling on Miss Austen.
I’ve always felt brazen reposting is a bit declasse, but, eh. I’m gonna do it anyways. (So if you’ve seen this before, go right ahead and feel all superior and act all snippy towards me–I can take it.;))
Jane lies in Winchester–blessed be her shade!
Praise the Lord for making her and her for all she made!
And while the streets of Winchester, or Milson Street, remain,
Glory, love, and honour unto England’s Jane!
–R. Kipling
I haven’t any right to criticize books, and I don’t do it except when I hate them. I often want to criticize Jane Austen, but her books madden me so that I can’t conceal my frenzy from the reader; and therefore I have to stop every time I begin. Everytime I read ‘Pride and Prejudice’ I want to dig her up and beat her over the skull with her own shin-bone.
–Mark Twain
Wow, now I love Mark Twain even more!