There’s no way for us to tell if you are in a slump or in the wrong marriage, but has others have said: don’t have kids until you get it figured out and decide that you want them.
I’m curious what your spouse’s standpoint on kids is. Whether or not you want to have kids (ever) is important to discuss early in a relationship. A couple where one wants kids and the other doesn’t tends to be unhappy; either they have kids (reluctantly or by accident) and the ‘childfree’ oriented spouse resents his family plus the poor kid grows up with a parent that didn’t want him/her to exist in the first place. Or you have a childless couple where one spouse is sad they never got to have a child.
In the case of that spouse being a woman, there is a limited timetable to have kids biologically, and some women DO want to have kids (I know its hard to believe to people on the SDMB 
). It sucks for those women in these types of relationships if all their childbearing years are wasted on a guy that isn’t going to change their mind, and instead of breaking off the relationship and finding someone who does, they just plod along.
Also, never stay in a marraige or relationship out of vanity or fear of being ostracized for divorcing/breaking up. This (along with the ‘kids’ talk obviously) was something my wife and I were very up front about. She told me verbatim, “Be with me because you want to be with me. If you’re not happy with that, there’s the door”. You’d be surprisd how long some people will let their marrage drag on because they feel embarassed about it not working out.
My wife and I have discussed every contingency, even the far fetched ones “What if you want to divorce me but I become an invalid before the divorce papers are signed?” “What if some woman comes out of the woodwork with a kid she claims is mine?”. Everybody hopes for the best but its easier to have a grounded and clear understanding of each other’s boundaries, expectations, and actions in these situations. Its easier to act with a clear head and decide whether you want to continue your marraige.
Nobody with any self-dignity wants to be married to someone who just stays out of pity/vanity/loneliness. Its not enough to be married someone to have a warm body around- Marraige should be about wanting to be with the person. And its a shitton of work. I know. I used to think marraige was the ‘easy’ part- get a woman to love you enough to be married to you, and you’re set for life. Nuh uh. Its another big step, and another big commitment, and if you’re not willing to put in the work, its better to walk away now then later.
Because what kid wouldn’t want to grow up, ask their father what prompted him to have a child, and hear, “Eh, just figured it was about time, y’know?”
I very much doubt that most people have clear unambiguous feelings on getting married or having kids. Or if they do, I’d be willing to bet that it’s because they reach a certain age and feel it’s “that time” because that’s what’s expected. That’s why everyone gets married around the same age. Or did you just think everyone “happens” to meet their soul mate at age 26?
There are pros and cons to each lifestyle. Being married can be nice, but it can also be a pain in the ass having to constantly live with someone else and consider their needs. Being single gives you a lot of freedom, but it can also be lonely. Especially as you get older and most of your friends get married.
But keep in mind you aren’t choosing between marriage and being 22 for the rest of your life.
I think he meant he was young in that he wasn’t some 22 year old kid. Not that he was young for…Earth.
OP appears to have become bored with his own OP. :dubious: Doesn’t bode well for the marriage.
Hope the OP doesn’t neglect his wife like he’s neglecting this thread. Otherwise his wife will have the same fate as this thread- piled on by strange opinionated people for a week.
… and both have hot chicks everywhere selling overpriced beer? Please tell me that’s true.
You need to at least tell her that you are definite about not wanting children. If she does want them, you are wasting her limited time to do something about it.
No, you were being childish when you “just went along with” getting married, even though you didn’t really want to.
Maybe he forgot to clear his history and his wife saw this thread and kicked him out?
Not in my world… first-marriage age for my peers and my brother’s peers has ranged from 20 to 45, so far.
It seems to me that we need a lot more specifics than the OP provides. “Bored” could mean quite a few things. I think I’m fairly representative of men in that sometimes my feelings about my career can start to color my perception of my whole life. But maybe the boredom is just in the bedroom and it’s time to spice things up a little. Or maybe the boredom is just indicating that this couple need to find some new hobbies, whether those are hobbies they do together or not.
Bored might just mean that the initial infatuation phase has worn off. Usually it only lasts about two years in any relationship. There’s no real way to get that feeling of being newly in love back, but I have found that it’s been replaced by other feelings of love that are perhaps not as intoxicating, but certainly just as cherished, and certainly more stable.