Is it really marriage that needs to be “redefined” or is it more like people, young and old, need to accept that they were never looking for “marriage” in the first place?
Marriage always has a few variations depending on where you go, but I think it’s safe to say that the general concept is that two people (typically male/female), are joined together, declare they will have a monogamous relationship, to have and to hold, till death do you part, blah blah blah. Somewhere in between that there is supposed to be love. Of course, we look across the world and find that a majority don’t have any of that.
Is that because marriage has a terrible definition, or is it really just that a lot of people don’t want to be bothered with marriage. we just do it because that’s the religious justification for sex and coziness with a person we’re sexually attracted to.
Part of the problem in the past was the Disney Land approach, but even with the internet that premise still exists today. Everyone goes in with the “this’ll be roses” perspective, and then they go through disappointment and it’s hell for them. I mean, come on, you’d think with the internet that this “marriage” problem would be fixed, but all it’s really done is that people get more picky with who they choose (a good thing), but then assume their good choice will be perfect (a bad thing). Despite the internet, and literature, that exists detailing and explaining how marriages can turn sour, and how one can go about communicating (read, not going to war) over the problems, we instead still have the terrible rocky relationships that our parents before us might have had, only we see fit to separate and dissolve them.
It’s not marriage that needs the redefintion. It’s people that need to redefine what they’re truly looking for, both in themselves and in their partner.
No amount of redefining marriage concepts will make “marriage” better or more suitable for society. It doesn’t matter how much rationality we have amassed. Relationships are irrational. They are not built upon logic. They do not survive on logic either. Marriage as a concept has seen some changes over time, but those changes really come from the people that have those marriages.