I’m using “married” as shorthand for “involved in a committed long-term relationship,” so gays, lesbians, and hets living in sin are welcome to chime in.
Answering my own question: my wife.
Oh, my husband, definitely. I had to put him off until I figured out what to do about the previous one.
That sounds bad, doesn’t it? I was very recently separated when we met, and he didn’t know I was married. I took my ring off pretty much as soon as I walked out the door (or got pushed out). It was a while before I really accepted that I had done everything I could and that marriage was just dead.
That would be me 
I kissed him in the log flume at a local amusement park. He didn’t see it coming and didn’t know how to respond to it either.
She was out with a friend, they stopped by to see me. Wife left the room to see someone else (in college). I commented that she was attractive. 15 minutes later wife returns, and my friends states, “He thinks you’re cute and wants to go out with you.”
So, first move was made by a mutual friend.
I’ve only been inviolved with her for a few months, so I don’t know if my opinion counts.
But it was very much mutual right from the start. We’re equally culpable.
Me. We were very close friends, and I told him in an e-mail I was starting to fall for him. I practically had to hit him over the head with a frying pan to get him to understand what I meant by that.
I don’t mess around or waste my time when it comes to love. You either like me or you don’t and I move on with my life. Fortunately for us, the feeling was mutual.
Oh, definitely him. I was suffering from marriage-phobia at the time and didn’t want to date anyone who might want to actually get married. We were friendly, and he emailed me hinting that he was going to ask me out. I remember it was lunchtime, and I had this great burrito, but I just checked my email first, and when I saw it I got so nervous that I completely lost my appetite and couldn’t eat. I still regret the loss of my yummy burrito. (Now I’m wanting one for lunch!)
Rightly or wrongly I personally believe that women nearly always engineer things so that we react in the right manner but we dont actually know that they’re pulling the strings.
Before anyone gets the wrong idea I think its a good thing,particulary when us blokes are much younger and shyer.
Left to most of us when we’re young we 'd fantasy like anything about how we’re going to ask them out but come the crunch we’d do a pretty good chicken impression.
My first missus came clean about how she had deliberately pretended to drop a pile of parcels(empty boxes that she had prepared earlier it turned out)and then "twisted"her ankle so that I had no option but to carry her parcels and half carry her home.
If it had been left up to me at that time I would have mooned and sighed over her continuosly
but would have never had the courage to ask her out in case she turned me down.
We had a parting of the ways when we grew a little older but I still love for that.
Women are generally cunning and I thank god for that.
Me, me, me. After bystanders pointed out that he obviously liked me, but never was going to make a move, I gave him my number. Then once we went out, I had to make the move to kiss him. If I’d waited for him to make a move, I’m convinced I still would be waiting.
Him, for a couple reasons–he realized how he felt about me far sooner than I realized how I felt about him, and I was in another relationship when we met, so it wasn’t until after that one fell through on its own that I was willing to entertain the possibility of dating him.
Do you mean who first asked whom out? A mutual friend introduced us sort of accidentally (not planning for it to be a set-up). The three of went out for a couple of drinks and had a pleasant evening together. I got her email address from said friend and emailed her a day or two after we met. I checked my email about 965 times over the next 24 hours.
If you mean who first grabbed the other and began the frenzied ripping of clothing…I’m not telling.
Him. I had a profile up on Yahoo! personals, but he contacted me first. And, he made the first move romantically.
(married since April, met four years ago)
Like I couldn’t find out with my trans-chronal viewmatic thing anyway.
Me. My future Thai wife and I were fellow grad students in Hawaii. We’d been out on a lot of “friendly” dates, so I decided it was time to make my move. I started to try to kiss her at sunset on Waikiki Beach. She said: “What are you doing?” “Um, nothing.” A couple of days later, she asked if I still wanted to kiss her. 
We’ve been together ever since.
As I’ve mentioned before, though, neither of us is sure who was the first to decide on marriage. At some point, it just became understood.
This is actually a point of contention betwixt Mrs. Hespos and me. I maintain that she winked first on Match.com. She says “no way.”
Of course, both of our accounts on Match.com were deleted right after we moved in together, so there’s no digital paper trail to follow.
We’re now happily married with a new baby, BTW.
How do you define"the first move"? I sent him a care package (mix CDs and homebaked cookies) a few days after meeting him in another time zone, and invited him up to visit. He accepted the invitation (after some prodding about dates, and a broad hint from a mutual friend that I was REALLY looking forward to his visit), but neither one of us really knew for sure how the weekend would turn out.
I can’t remember which of us touched the other in an affectionate way first (I recall him mussing my hair, and my asking him permission to muss his hair, but not in which order), and I hugged him first, and well, things got mutual quite rapidly after that. Two months later, he moved cross-country to shack up with me, and that was a year ago this coming weekend.
I met my wife at work. I was in the process of breaking up with someone else, so I didn’t ask her out for a few months. When I did ask her out she said that she was wondering if I was ever going to ask. I said, “You could have asked me out, you know.” She said that she never would have done that. She would have let me get away rather than ask me out. She’s mental.
So it was me, and it wouldn’t have happened otherwise.
Well, I approached her first for us to meet, but after that it was definitely her. She impulsivvely kissed me when we said good night (she said she wanted me to remember her). And she quit her job and moved to my city to be with me. I’m not sure I had any say in that, in fact.
We met online, and he e-mailed me first. In person, I went in for the kiss before he did, and I said “I love you” mere minutes before he was going to. 
I’m under strict orders not to propose to him under any circumstances: he wants that one for himself.
That would be her. She kissed me in the log flume at a local amusement park. I didn’t see it coming, but I played it soooo cool after it happened.
What?