Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch’s parentage may be the single most frequently retconned part of the entire Marvel universe. At some point, they will have been canonically the children of every single other Marvel character, including ones that are younger than them. Up next: they’re the love children of Galactus and the Fantastic Four’s doorman!
I don’t suppose that Moon Girl, Kamala, or now Toro (!!!) should count, as they’ve all been tacked on to the Inhumans for various reasons but are really their own concepts.
Medusa’s and Black Bolt’s respective levels of dickishness depend on the story. I guess Karnak is generally at least a little bit of a dick.
And yet, from what little I’ve seen of that series, he was still not as dire an utter useless dick as the triumvirate of stupid dickery that is T’Challa + Reed + Tony. (This is a series where everyone is a dire utter useless dick, but Namor at least* tried *to deal with stuff, in his dickish way.)
The only good scene the Illuminati ever had was Spectrum and Blue Marvel scolding them for leaving everybody else out of the loop in the face of a universe-shattering problem.
Apparently the jackass responsible for this policy has left the company, which is definitely a good thing. And that’s possibly part of the reason why the Inhumans movie got put on hiatus.
That might be a coincidence. I don’t know what’s happening on the DC side, but we’ve seen some absolutely idiotic storylines on the Marvel side - One More Day released the same year as Spiderman 3 and the Avengers movies started around the same time as Civil War, which lead into a bunch of other stupid crossover events.
Fuck everything. Get this guy his own movie!
No, no, no! They’re the love children of H.E.R.B.I.E. and Willie Lumpkin!
All the ideas are officially done if motherfucking GOLDBALLS is a thing.
If that were actually true-- they’d stop doing X-men comics, Spiderman comics, etc. etc.
I was introduced to the Inhumans in a FF comic from the seventies that featured Xemu the Merciless from the Fifth Dimension (yes, The Thing metioned the music group). It was during the period when Medusa was a member of FF because HT was on haitus (although he was with them in the battle with Xemu. Xemu and his henchmen for some reason thought chains would be sufficient to restrain Ben. I did like them in that three part story.
That’s because he communicated with grand gestures, and the Inhuman Greek Chorus would translate. “He points towards the disaster shelters! We must go there now!”
Why? You can show how enormous a threat is by having Storm strain herself and get hospitalized trying to handle the crazy weather – and then Thor shows up and saves the day. Or maybe some X-Men get mind-controlled and pit their powers against the mere skills of Hawkeye and Captain America – and the heroic underdogs get the win. Or maybe Charles Xavier gets incapacitated, and Stephen Strange spends months running things at the X-Mansion – and does it better than the Prof ever did.
(What’s that? Stephen is called away for a year-long adventure in a parallel-timeline universe? Sentinels are on the march, stomping mutants left and right? Have no fear; Ant-Man is here! Yeah, he was out buying some rosé for his buddy’s wedding, so he’s on kind of a tight timetable – but he’ll take care of this in no time flat.)
I find your ideas intriguing, Waldo, and I would like to subscribe to your newsletter, or perhaps your run on “The Avengers Save the X-men”