For the last couple of gift-giving occasions, my wife has taken to giving me gift certificates for professional massages. Truly a wonderous thing. However, being a newbie to the whole massage thing, I find myself wondering a few things.
What should I ask for (keep it clean)? I’ve had two so far with two different masseuses (both women - me not) and they have been different yet satisfying. One seemed to work the whole muscle and was more into the scented oils and relaxation, while the other concentrated on “trigger” points and used only the one oil. I enjoyed them both, but there seems to be a lot of variety out there. For dopers out there who have had more experience in this than me, what works for you?
Should I feel weird about a same-sex masseuse.? As mentioned above, both of my experiences have been with women, more by accident than anything (the 1st was the one who worked on my wife when she was preggers, the second was randomly assigned by the receptionist). Although I don’t think having a male masseuse assigned would neccesarily freak me out, I do feel kinda weird about another guy massaging my heiny (keep your paperback psychoanalysis to yourself please).
What should I tip? Tipping seems to be optional, but encouraged. Yet, I cant’ seem to get anyone to tell me what a proper amount is.
Working for an enlightened company out here in California, we have massages available to us one day a week… and I really look forward to Wednesdays. To answer some of your questions…
What should you ask for? What do you want? Each masseus has their own style… some are soft and gentle… others rough you up a bit. I’ve had some that were really into the oil and incense while others don’t both with either… or just use a hand lotion. You have to decide what works best for you. I don’t like the oil that much so the less the better and I feel better after a fairly rough workout than just a back rub. To each his own… find out what you like and ask for it. Often the masseus will ask you if you need anything in particular… like extra attention to your shoulders etc. After a while if you use the same person they will get use to your specific issues and it no longer becomes something you even have to think about. And yes, there is a lot of variety out there. There are various schools of massage… but apparently nothing is cast in stone.
Same sex massages take some getting used to. Some people don’t care one way or another while for others (like me) it took a while to get use to a male touching my body. You can try it once and see how it feels… BTW, legitimate massueses are trained to avoid doing anything that might be construed as sexual… it’s a bad idea all around.
Tipping is optional and should be based on how good a job they did. Did they really work you over or just go through the motions? Think of tipping as you would a stylist or barber… $5 says you were happy… $10 says you were really happy!
I have several friends who are massage therapists (btw, that’s the preferred moniker, to gain distance from “exotic” massage, of the non G-rated variety) and have enjoyed the benefits of their skills immensely.
A good rundown of the different types of massage can be found here.
Different essential oils are usually mixed with the normal friction-reducing necessity according to your preference. Ask to sample what the MT has to offer. Some, like lavender, are conducive to relaxation. Others, like Arnica, are better for muscle aches.
Above all, always communicate to your MT what your level of comfort is. People have widely variable sensitivities. I can have someone pound on my back with a jackhammer and be happy, but others are more sensitive .
Also, one massage session is usually not enough to alleviate a chronic problem. It may take several weekly sessions to find relief from a particular muscle trauma.
If yer honeybun is giving you this as a gift, count yourself lucky! The worst is to have five minutes of well-meaning ministrations, when it really takes an hour of concentrated attention. Hope this helps ya!
Men usually have stronger hands, so if you want more pressure you’d have to get a guy. I need a lot of pressure & the woman said if I want more pressure to get a bulldozer.
You can get free massages if you volunteer to be a subject for massage classes. There are a lot of people in the room then so you’re more likely to not have any hanky panky.
One woman who gave me a massage got on top of me on the table & that made me sort of go hmmmmmmm.
I work as an MT on evenings and weekends - and for what it’s worth, ** handy **, I’m female and could probably poke my thumbs through the fender of a Chevy Nova. But then I’m a bit of a brute. As for the woman getting on the table with you, there are some specific forms of massage that use that technique - Thai massage and some forms of Shiatsu. Kind of depends on how she did it…
I know for me at least, and for all the other MT’s I know, giving someone a massage is not at all sexual. It’s a little like being an OB/GYN - it’s your job, not an adventure. I don’t even think of it as sexual when I’m massaging my boyfriend - I’m much more likely to be thinking of the muscle I’m working on than what’s under the sheets.
The only problem I’ve had is with clients who think that “masseuse” is a synonym for “hooker”. (Sigh.) There are those out there, to be sure, but if you’re seeing a reputable, licensed MT, it should be a strictly professional and therapeutic session.
The most important thing is to make sure you’re comfortable with the situation - otherwise, you won’t be able to relax completely, and you won’t get the full benefit. Same sex MT’s should be fine, but if you don’t feel quite right, don’t do it. The session is really all about your comfort, and any professional should understand that.
"The only problem I’ve had is with clients who think that “masseuse” is a synonym for “hooker”.
(Sigh.) There are those out there, to be sure, but if you’re seeing a reputable, licensed MT, it
should be a strictly professional and therapeutic session. "
Yeah, I always jokingly ask them how much it is for ‘extras’
Oh, and BTW, handy, I’ve never wished that the women could use more pressure. Geez, they felt like they were trying to turn me into a hand puppet a couple of times.
