Of all the courses that have stuck with me, my Nietzsche courses stuck with me the most. I started with a freshman seminar, which was an elective requirement for people in my program. So maybe 12 people to a class. Up until that point I had been a devout Christian in the middle of a crisis of faith, and well, let’s just say that Nietzsche speaks to you when you’re having a crisis of faith.
He opened the seminar by disseminating the following quote:
“God is dead. God remains dead. And we have killed him. How shall we comfort ourselves, the murderers of all murderers? What was holiest and mightiest of all that the world has yet owned has bled to death under our knives: who will wipe this blood off us? What water is there for us to clean ourselves? What festivals of atonement, what sacred games shall we have to invent? Is not the greatness of this deed too great for us? Must we ourselves not become gods simply to appear worthy of it?”
I’d never read the quote in context, before (well, with more context - the real context wouldn’t come until later in the course.) I just remember thinking, “Shit, that’s exactly what it feels like. Straying through an infinite nothing.”
The professor of the course, well he was something else. An Oxford-educated guy with a Boston accent, who wore horrific sweaters. I mean the worst you can imagine. He couched everything not only in the context of the work, but Nietzsche’s life, such that I’m convinced you can’t really understand his philosophy very well without understanding his experience.
I know so many random fucking anecdotes about Nietzsche now. For example, he was catatonic in his later life, probably due to syphilis, and his sister in law used to wheel him out in front of people and charge them to see him. One day, when she was talking about his books, he looked up wistfully and said, “I once wrote books.”
I ended up taking two more courses with Nietzsche in them, taught by that same professor. The first was called 1889: Nietzsche’s Final Year and Descent into Madness (I mean that is a baller course title, am I right?) That’s where we learned all the shit about Elizabeth Forster-Nietzsche and what an exploitative evil Nazi she was. The other class was Intro to Existentialism, so we read more than just Nietzsche. We read some Camus and some Sartre and some Conrad and a book I really loved called The Confusions of Young Torless.
The prof told us before we began the existentialism course, “If you have any tendency toward depression, maybe rethink taking this.” I did actually have to withdraw at the end of the course due to depression. But I’m glad I hung in as long as I did, some of the coolest stuff I’ve ever read/discussed.
I don’t really know what to say, beyond that these courses profoundly influenced my worldview and still feel relevant to me today, twenty years later. In contrast, I look at my old philosophy papers from 17th and 18th Century Philosophy and I don’t understand a damn thing I wrote.