Hey, $5.99 may or may not be a reasonable price for mushrooms, but for these babies? Bargain! 
Daycare center near my old apartment:
English & Spanish
[something something] Vouchers Accepted
Inroll Today!
Reminds me of this unfortunately shortened URL someone pointed out yesterday. ETA: although someone has cleaned up (heh) the non-cached one. Someone at the SDMB must have squealed (heh!)
Do they come with rainbow-colored suspenders?
Took me a minute to get that one. 
I never sawsige a thing before! 
(My apologies to Pedro)
There’s a carwash place I pass on the bus going to work, it has a hand-painted notice on the wall that says “No Parkig”.
Not a sign, but a half-page ad in a free newspaper that’s distibuted on the transport network every day, there’s a cosmetic dentistry academy that offers “free check-ups’s”.
I saw a auto repair place in Queens this weekend advertising “Break jobs”. I also saw a Chinese restaurant menu selling “Shrimp dumpings”.
Up in New Hampshire, there was a hair salon that had a sign:
“Going elsewhere?
Your paying to much!”
I actually emailed them about that sign, but they never changed it.
This one is a little more subtle, but I always get a kick out of it for some bizarre reason. On the corner of 47th Street and Archer Ave. in Chicago, there’s a road sign that says: 47[sup]st[/sup] St.
There’s also this place up the street that serves “HOMADE PIZZA.” That also gives me a chuckle, at least given the way I parse that.
There’s a sign on the front door of a local bar & grill type of restaurant near my house:
“Close on Sundays.”
I guess the restaurant moves itself further away on Monday morning. Until Saturday night, of course.
In Wales, road signs need to be translated into Welsh. Unfortunately there aren’t always enough people around. An example would be
“No entry for heavy goods vehicles. Residential site only”.
which was translated to
nid wid yn y swyddfa ar hyn o bryd. Anfonwch unrhyw waith i’w gyfethu.
unfortuantely, that actually means
“I am not in the office at the moment. Send any work to be translated”.
A local grocery store was having a sale on “Fugi Apples.” I once saw “Peecan Pie” advertised outside a diner.
And another one today. A local asian store, “We Sale Ice Cole Coke”
Never realized how bad the signs are around here. This is kind of scary!
Some years back UTEP (UT El Paso) proudly unveiled a series of billboards featuring the advertising slogan for their new athletic season: WAC WITH A VENGANCE. After a few news cycles featuring expressions of mirth among dictionary-wielding journalists (and vents of outrage from English teachers), the signs were quietly replaced. The new, improved billboards read WAC WITH A VENGENCE.
At a garage:
Tires balenced
At a Chinese restaurant:
WE DELIVERY
There is another Chinese restaurant named
ESUOH
FO
TNEIRO
It’s that way on both sides of the sign.
And before they changed to their new menus a Thai place near me had a menu which had a greeting to its customers at the beginning. “We welcome our quests to our restaurant”, or something like that. I used to go there with Autolycus a lot, and he would always start his order “For my quest, I would like…” Cracked us up every time.
A quick scan of this lead me to believe this was about an advertising slogan that somehow came out “WAC WITH A VENGEANCE”, which is silly enough as it is.
UTEP belonged to the Western Athletic Conference (WAC) at the time. So, yes, the slogan was supposed to be “WAC WITH A VENGEANCE.”
I snapped a picture in the spring for a Sylvan Learning Centre sign:
REPORT CARD
SHOCK? CALL
SYLVAN TODAY FOR
1/2 PRICE
ASSESMENT
The sign was a rental with the moveable letters, but it had decorative details and perfect alignment, so it didn’t look like it had been changed. It was also there for a couple of months.
Hey, I’ve been to that store…it’s down the block from my wifes family. There is another sign a few blocks away declaring “HEAVY PLANT CROSSING” where the road is naturally overgrown with vegetation (used to be just around the corner here).
Passing a farm in Oklahoma we saw a portable sign on their property that read “ARM FOR SALE”. No price was mentioned, but I bet it cost an … never mind.
At a truckstop was the sign
POSTED
NO
TRESPASSING
ALLOWED
VIOLATORS SUBJECT
TO BE PROSECUTED
… so all the truck drivers just used verbs and exclamations.
NO PARKING
OF COMMERCIAL
VEHICLES IS
PROHIBITED
WILL BE TOWED
So if you don’t park there your vehicle will be towed there?!
There is the sign “NO STANDING ANY DAY 11pm-6am”. So you’ll just have to sit early in the morning.
A sign at the local high school informed us of a unique opportunity to come to the “WRESTLING PARENT MEETING”. Shouldn’t that be “parents”, unless of course the person is very limber?
The following are not wrong, just a bit … off:
Yellowstone has the sign “MAMMOTH RESTROOM”, but it doesn’t seem unduly large to me.
“PLANT ENTRANCE AHEAD” has always made me chuckle.
McCURLEY'S
SEPTIC TANK
CLEANING
{hours and phones}
AEROBIC SYSTEM
INSTALLED
Okay, this is correct, but do you really want your gym equipment installed by Mr. McCurley?
At the Cox Fish Hatchery in Athens, TX is a display of bees with a button and a sign over it that says “PRESS BUTTON TO HEAR BEE TALK”. This is funnier because our son’s nickname is “Bee” and he doesn’t talk much.
On the USS Lexington in Corpus Christi TX is an aircraft gun emplacement with the sign:
YOU ARE WELCOME TO
PLAY ON THE GUN
USE CAUTION TO PREVENT INJURY
PLEASE PUT GUN BACK IN
ORIGINAL POSITION
WHEN DONE