Monty Python non sequitur thread (Part 1)

Get back in the cupboard you pantomimetic royal person.

Right. I used to get up in the morning at night at half-past-ten at night, half an hour before I went to bed, Eat a lump of freezing cold poison, work 28 hours a day at mill, and pay da mill owner to let us work there. And when I went home our dad used to murder us in cold blood, each night, and dance about on our graves, singing hallelujah.

Yeah, you try an tell the young people of today that, and they won’t believe you

Wait for it…!

Spam!

Say no more! Say no more!

No, it isn’t.

Look, if I’m to argue I must take a contrary position.

Did you want a blowjob, or have you come to arrange a holiday?

Michael, do you think you know what a larch tree looks like?

Bottom!

And now for something completely different. A man with three buttocks!

That’s the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on!

It’s not even a proper nose. It’s polystyrene.

One of us is wearing a wig.

The expurgated version. The one without the gannet.

And now for something more completely different...

It’s…

What’s so special about the cheesemakers?

Are you selling something?

Oh, I’m sorry, I have a cold.