I’m not sure if this is what you’re looking for, but in Civ III, I hate forming an alliance with Gandhi. He is absolutely worthless. He never actually sends any troops when you’re attacked, and as often as not, he makes a deal with your enemy for free passage over his territory.
There’s one part of X-2 where he collapses on the floor for some reason (I haven’t played it in a while, and can’t remember), and if you walk over him, he goes ‘ow’, ‘oof’, ‘argh’ etc.
Guess what I always end up spending a half hour doing?
Juhani from Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic pissed me off a couple of times. You could choose a Jedi class for your character, and certain classes came with certain abilities. Juhani was a Jedi Guardian, which gave her the ability to instantly leap over moderate distances to fight the enemy, provided she had a clear path. The problem was, unless you chose the Guardian class for your character, she was the only one in the party with this ability. She got my party killed on more than one occasion by jumping ahead, getting ganged up on and dying, thereby leaving my party considerably weaker. Stupid Juhani. Shoulda killed her in the grove when I had the chance…
There’s a simple solution to this. Step 1: Sign Right of Passage. Step 2: Place tanks next to his cities. Step 3: Profit!
Captain fucking Keyes in Halo.
His speech goes like this:
"OK, men. I am the only person here who can put a stop to this alien armada. Granted, we have the galaxy’s foremost warrior with us, and, granted, he’s got armor and force shields and some huge-ass guns, but only the neural implant in my fat, overweight, tactically-unsound body can win the day for us. Since I have no armor and do not move very quickly, **I must be protected at all costs. **Do you hear me? At all costs. Without me, the galaxy is doomed.
“Right, then. Give me that useless half-empty weapon. I’m on point.”
What the FUCK? I can remember throwing my beer at the television, then a half-filled ashtray, then a book, then whatever else was within reach every time that moron ran right past me, charging into the room with Invisible Sword Guy.
With idiots like him in charge, no wonder humanity was getting its ass handed to it by Grunts.
Navi’s advice is brief, at least.
I hated that stupid owl ten times more.
No.
At least Ormus didn’t follow you everywhere. Deckard Cain and his endless spiel about how to use the Horadric Cube I created several frickin’ levels ago was much more annoying.
My most hated “allies” though have to be everyone, including Snake, in Metal Gear Solid 2. Seriously, 11 hours of “gameplay” and I swear 9 of it was spent on the phone or on cutscenes. Shut up and let me play!
He was a fuckwit. I remember having to zigzag around his head with the sniper rifle to kill that fucking invisible Elite.
Glad THAT’S in the past…
:dubious:
I hear ya. She’s annoying to talk with, too. I think that the only way to make Qara halfway-useful in combat is to use the cheat codes to pare down her spell list so she doesn’t cast any useless spells. Grobnar is irritating as hell, too. They’re supposed to have high charisma scores, dammit!
I’m going old school here.
Akbar Bel Akash from Curse of the Azure Bonds. He’s on your side and in every fight BAM! Fireball right in your face.
I nominate Ian from the first Fallout. Never give him a gun with a burst mode, because it’s a guarantee that you’ll end up with 80% of everything he fires in the back of your own head.
Well, maybe I just got extra angry at him, but I do remember having to go back around the corner and down the hall to find him cowering. It wouldn’t have been so bad if he did it only when he was shot at or something, but he did it every damn time there was gunfire - IIRC, even when I shot.
Other than that, it was a great game for as cheap as it was. Some of the things also sucked about it, but not bad enough to make me stop playing - of course the scientist didn’t make me stop either, just made me angry.
Brendon Small
What is it with D&D games and crappy NPC spellcasters. It’s almost a given that they’re going to go out of their way to kill you. IIRC, Pool of Radiance didn’t have allied NPCs in combat (at least none come to mind off the top of my head) but once they show up in Bonds they start a path of PC hating destruction that has run for twenty years.
A NPC means non-player character, so no, she’s not. But I think what you really mean to say is, that she’s one of the first “ally” characters that you have to escort around in a mission. Whether this is true or not I don’t know. I’d doubt it.
Yeah, but I **liked ** that feature. I could just shoot and have Dr. Schenker stay there and cower while I cleared out all the baddies in front. Come back, get the doctor, and go merrily on our way. After all of stupid Keyes-esque allies I’ve had to put up with, that was nice.
Of course, it’s probably just a difference in our play styles. YMMV and all that.