Why do people care what happens to their body after they are dead?
I don’t mean why do the living care what happens to your body, but why do you care?
I can’t stand the practice of embalming a corpse and then putting it in an expensive box at the front of room while everyone talks in hushed tones and pretends it is just sleeping. I will never do that to anyone, if I have any say. However, when I am gone, I don’t care what my family does with me. Cut me up and feed me to the dog or pump me full of chemicals and display me under soft lights. Either way is fine.
Why do some people want their ashes spread on a beach? Why do some people want to be buried next to their spouse?
I think it makes them feel good, now, when they are still living, to think that is how they will end up. Although I still don’t get why knowing their ashes will be scattered in the ocean makes them feel good.
And then this questions: do you feel obligated to fufill someone’s wish for how they want their remains disposed? If my spouse were to say "I want my ashes spread from the top of Mt. Rushmore while a choir of boys sings ‘Papa Was a Rolling Stone,’ I might say “Sure, honey, you got it.” But when the time comes, am I still obligated to fulfill the wish? Who am I obligated to? A corpse? A memory? Can you offend the dead?
Well, assuming that their aren’t any appartitions hanging about after death, then of course youn cannot offend them. Assuming that there are, who knows?
Insofar as why people care, aside from religious beliefs that is, I think it is a way for some folks to have some modicum of control of the Big Finale. Collectively, we humans are awful uncertain as to the nature and possible aftermath of death, and arranging for the disposition of our corpus is one way we can have a say in what comes after. The choice of resting place/dispersal is probably largely symbolic and reflective of one’s personal tastes. (Just in case there’s anything to the life after death thing, I want my ashes to be sprinkled over Cindy Crawford!)
As to the question of obligation, I would say that we carry out the last wishes of the departed for a variety of reasons. On the one hand, some people keep promises just because the promise was made. “My word is my bond.” I suppose these people are obligated to themselves. Others who believe that the departed still survives in an afterlife are no doubt still keeping faith with the deceased themselves. Still other people choose to do so to honor the memory of the departed, as a ritualistic way of grieving and showing respect. Lastly, I think there is an unwritten societal code that we try to honor the dead’s last wishes, even though they are powerless to prevent us from ignoring them, so that when our turn comes those remaining will honor our last wishes. Inheritance works in a similar way in that we uphold the right of others to dispose of their property after death (when it is really impossible to own or give anything) so that we may insure the right to do so ourselves.