She’s not usually the most energetic or outgoing soul, but today she’s seeming really out of it. I finally ask her, “What’s the deal? You pop a bunch of 'ludes this morning or what?”
“Huh?”
“Did you have Quaaludes for breakfast?”
“No. What? Huh? … I don’t do drugs I took some Xanax this morning yeah maybe that’s it…”
This is entertaining.
Well as I take Xanax it doesn’t make me energetic .Her results must vary. I kind of miss those ludes. 2 ludes and a six pack ? Slobberfest 3000 
The humor of this situation depends greatly on the nature of your work.
I’m thinking it’s more like Slobberfest 1975. 
Any chance that she’s diabetic and having a sugar low? One of my friends at work hid her diabetes from all of us until the day we had to call the paramedics to revive her.
Whatever is going on, keep an eye on her and don’t just assume she’ll be okay.
Omegaman, I should have elaborated: She’s not very energetic to begin with, and with the Xanax on top of that…imagine if someone dosed Snuffleupagus with tranquilizers. I didn’t use any punctuation not because she was talking without it, but because she’s speaking so monotonously that it can be punctuated. Whatever the polar opposite of an exclamation point (“i”?) should go after every word.
Luckily it’s been really slow today, so this hasn’t been a problem.
This made me laugh out loud. Quaaludes, beer, a Corvette Stingray and some Black Sabbath.
And don’t forget the trees and telephone poles that like to jump out in front of you…
(What? Me, experienced with senseless drunken/drugged driving?)
Your co-worker was gonna fax you a memo, until she got high.
She was gonna arrange to charter your limo, but then she got high.
Now your office is all messed up, and you know why
It’s 'cuz she got high, because she got high, because she got hiiiiiiigh…
She was gonna put a cover on her TPS report, before she got high
She was gonna copy, collate and sort, but then she got high
Now the boss is chewin’ her out, and you know why
Because she got high, 'cuz she got high, 'cuz she got hiiiiiigh…
She was gonna brew the office some coffee, but she got high
She was gonna update your PC’s McAfee, until she got high
Now you’re cranky and your screen’s full of pop-ups, and you know why
It’s because she got high, because she got high, 'cuz she got hiiiiiigh…
And damn you for the rest of the day, for getting Afroman stuck in my head. :mad: 
Xanax is an anti-anxiety medication sometimes used for sleep problems, and rather unfortunately, for quite a lot of other things.
I took it every night for several years to help me sleep, because I was having a lot of stress related sleep problems. I called those problems The Spin Cycle, because I would literally wake up every 5-30 minutes all night long, roll over and go back to sleep.
So no small wonder why your co-worker is completely zoned.
Great song there, OneCentStamp.
The boss came back, so StonedCoworker got to go home. This is probably for the best, but what am I going to do for fun now? And don’t suggest reading mangetout’s giraffe-o-meter theories, because I’ve already done that.