Oh, Hell, people. I’m 43 and Old. Just shoot me now.
I remember having the biggest crush on Helen Hunt what seems like yesterday. She was the blonde tomboy in a really bad dance movie where she makes Sarah Jessica Parker look like bad chopped liver in. every. scene. She had a 10-second hooker part in ‘Fright Night’ that was, to me, literally worth rewinding the tape just to see. I even liked her first two years asJamie Buchman.
Well, life goes on and years go by. She stows an Oscar under her belt. But I always pictured her as I first saw her in the 80s and 90s.
Good Og, wtf happened? Did I fall asleep in a bowling alley in Tarrytown, NY? In that shot, she looks like she just popped up from the swiming pool in Poltergeist to scare the hell out of Jo Beth Williams!!! Did she p.o. the photographer? Is she trying to look less sexy so people will only think ‘Director’ every time they see her? (Is it like the Bridesmaids Rule: make 'em look ugly so they don’t upstage the Bride/Lead Actress?)
Or did a cannister of George Romero reanimating gas leak in her basement?
Damn you, Time, Leave my memories be! Or just take me altogether…
It’s the thin. The players started passing her by at a certain age, and she fell at the mercy of the designer publicity mill and remade herself to their specifications = no t, no a, no curves, no cheeks. You are just a walking clothes hanger, a blank canvas for the commerce of fickle men who pay lip service to female beauty but have no use for the real thing.
She looks fine; what in the world are you going on about? I think that shot caught her at an awkward moment, between two expressions. Like you, she’s 43, and is a damn good-looking woman.
Fine. I’m over reacting. Its just normal aging and a bad picture; not some kind of lift gone wrong and definately not Jennifer Grey, part2. Thankfully, she’s never had to lay eyes on a picture of me and she never will.
Well, I’ve found my walker; if a kindly Mod could just close the thread behind me, I have to head out for more Geritol anyway. Now that Medicare is paying for my Diabetes testing, its just the Right thing to do…
She’s squinting? Crow’s feet? 20 years older, maybe? Still lookin’ fine to me. Here’s a publicity shot from last year’s film Bobby– why hello, my little frosted-lipstick kitten! – which I think amply demonstrates that she’s still perfectly attractive even while seated next to Martin Sheen and his alarming incisors. (Seriously, Martin? Don’t smile like that, it makes you look like a prairie dog.)
And the reanimating gas is Dan O’Bannon’s. Romero don’t need no stinkin’ gas.
