So I woke up this morning with a big sore lump on the bottom of my face.:eek:
Shit! My glands are infected, I thought. So I try to get ahold of my doctor. Have you ever tried to get ahold of a doctor on a sunday without going to ermegency?
But he tells me to come to his clinic, he’ll be there.
Doc checks me out, and tells me my glands are not infected.
Then he asks me if I sleep with my mouth open.
How the fuck should I know? I have no idea what the hell I’m doing while I’m sleeping. I could be doing horrible things like remaking a fucking awful musical like the Music Man for all I know.
(hey. 2 rants in one post! )
So Doc goes on to tell me that I may be sleeping with my mouth open, which is why my saliva gland got dried out and is blocked!
Which is why I noticed it in the morning.
Christ. A blocked saliva gland?:eek: :eek: That sounds really bad!
What do I need? Medication? Surgery?
No, doc says. Just suck on some lemons for the next day or so and it will clear up.
He goes to school for 400 years to become a doctor and all he can tell me is to suck lemons?
Then he tells me he can write me a prescription for them if it will help get my insurance to pay for them!:rolleyes:
Lemons are on sale this week at Pick N Save 5 for a buck. I think I can manage! Suck lemons indeed! I wanted medical marijuana!