My Ex-Mother-In-Law Is DEAD!

Ding, dong the witch is dead!!!

I opened the newspaper this morning and saw that my ex-mother-in-law had died. After looking to see what killed the bitch (it didn’t say), my first thought was, “Whatever it was, I hope it hurt a lot.”

May you burn in hell for all the nasty things you did to me when I was too young and “un-formed” to understand personal boundaries and defend myself. And fuck your step-son for letting you do it.

While I’m at it, fuck the whole family. You all said you hated her behind her back, but acted all lovey-dovey to her face. Blame your father, that weak, ineffectual bastard for bringing her into the house. Now that she’s dead, I bet you all cry great big crocodile tears at her funeral and say what a wonderful woman she was.

The good thing about hypocrites is you can always count on them.

I hope your fat ass is sizzling from hellfire as we speak…

When my father-in-law dies, the only tears I’ll shed will be for my husband (who says “I love him, but I don’t like him”), his siblings, and my MIL.

Let’s hear stories! Here, I’ll get you started:
Squeaker Snow:**This one time? ____________________<==now you fill in the blank! Please use the back of the paper if necessary.

Mom, is that you?

I think SOMEone has gotten in touch with her feelings. :smiley:

What exactly is wrong with some of you? All this vile & hatred towards a human being!?!:mad:

Who really spends enough time with their inlaws to really get to know them?
You should embrace your mother or father in-law, and unconditionally love them like you would your own parent!

Just :wink:kidding!

By the way, Squeaker, I don’t know where you’re from, but in the USA most states have open records. Go down to the court house in the county that she assumed room temperature in (or call them if it’s too far away) and look at the official death certificate. Who knows? The cause of death may be entertaining enough to be worth the trip! :smiley:

Who’s your Soul Mate?
Predict exactly, down to the name, who your Love Soul Mate is. Try it!

The mind absolutely boggles.

The gerbils are obviously on some new and interesting drug to make them select this as an appropriate ad!

Hee hee…

The Google Ads I’m getting:

Cold Calling Is Dead
Locate your Father, Today
Hell according to Islam

Oh well, nothing much to add except how happy I am that I lucked out in the in-law department.

Isn’t wishing Eternal Damnation on a person that is already dead against board policy? If not, it should be because it that seems more serious than the original rule if the wish works.

This is for you Squeaker Snow

I feel your pain.

My MIL is not on speaking terms with either my husband or his brother. Basically she got caught trash talking me and my husband’s brother’s wife behind our backs. Instead of admitting it and apologizing she essentially told both men that they had to chose between her and their wives. My brother-in-law is in counseling because of her reaction. My own husband has a place in his heart that still hurts from finding out what kind of person gave birth to him.

I personally felt like an idiot after finding out because I’ve never known her to say a nice word about anyone behind their backs who isn’t her youngest daughter.

One of the proudest moments of my life was having the nerve to write to her that the next time she said, “but that’s who my son married” in a nasty tone of voice that I hoped her brain fell out of her skull. She has literally never seen (nor made any effort to see) my three year daughter who is one of her granddaughters.

Despite this letter she’s still sent me Christmas presents three years in a row! She sent nothing to her own eldest son but specifically addressed the Harry & David fruit to me. That act deserves to win her a place in the the passive-aggressive hall of fame. I am waiting to see if she sends another one this year after I wrote another letter telling her that all I really wanted was her respect.

Since I’ll never get it and I doubt it’s worth much my SIL and I hope to live to pee on her grave.

That was pretty weird.

Never had a child, so nope. :slight_smile:

Lavender, I think you should “return” the fruit. But wait a little while, you know, until after it’s been “processed.”

I just gotta give this OP applause for pure honest-to-goodness contemptuous scorn. If only more people could tell those who done them wrong to fuck off so well.

Last year I made a snow-woman in my backyard, put a picture of my MIL’s face on it and hurled the fruit at it.

But I like your idea better. :smiley:

Well, except for the comment about his kids and your mother-in-law morning the guy, you pretty much nailed how my mother feels about my grandfather, the miserable bastard.

Depends whether the speaker believes in it or not, maybe? :slight_smile:

Whats the penalty for bigamy…2 mother in laws.

I dunno, that sounds damn fun.